Page 155 of How You See Me
“It’s how I feel when I forget George at home and have to do my treatments without him.” She drags her favorite stuffed giraffe out from under the blanket, its long, squishy legs dangling in the air.
“I bet George misses you, too, when you’re gone. I know I did.”
She curls the animal into her chest and rolls toward me. “Will you marry Josie?”
“Well . . .”
Isn’t it too soon to be thinking about marriage? We don’t know yet how our relationship works outside ofvacation mode and there’s the long-distance issue. What about my career? How does Josie fit into that world? Do I fit into hers?
Despite all those questions, the only answer I can consider with confidence is, “I’d like to one day. If she’ll have me.”
“Why wouldn’t she? You’re the best.”
That soothes the ache some. It’s not the first time she’s said it, but I guess I needed to hear it today. “Thank you.”
“She said she wanted to be with you when she gets back.”
“Dating and marriage are two different things. We still have a lot to figure out before we talk about an engagement.”
“Like what? Don’t you love her?”
“Almost as much as I love you.”
She giggles, but it’s low and hoarse, not the windchime song she had before getting sick. “What else is there?”
“You watch too many fairy tale movies.” I let out a sarcastic chuckle. “She may be beautiful as a princess, but I’m no Prince Charming.”
“No. You’re better. I bet you’re like the knight who makes her feel safe.”
“I hope so. But how can I do that when I’m at the base or overseas?” The question spills out of me faster than I can stop it.
I know Josie’s capable of taking care of herself, and she’s braver than she gives herself credit for. But if we’re together, I’ll want to be by her side, protecting her,encouraging her, loving her in every possible way. And not just through letters or video calls whenever I have a free moment.
“Haysie?” Ava asks like I blanked out and missed something.
“Yeah?”
“What were you thinking about?” Her eyelids flutter slowly, fighting sleep.
“In a roundabout way, I think I’ve officially decided to retire sooner than later. I don’t want to wait.”
“Retire?”
“Leave the Marines.”
“Does that mean you can come visit me more?”
The soothing warmth of a long overdue homecoming radiates through me, realizing what retirement truly means. “Better. I can go and live anywhere I want.”
“Oh.”
“And you know the best part?”
“What?” A new energy buzzes in her movements, sensing my excitement.
“I’ll be able to do more than just visit.”
“Really? We could see each other every day?”
