Page 85 of Pictures in Blue
I place the tray on my side table instead and reach out my arms for her. “C’mere.”
Slowly, she moves out of her tight cocoon and wraps her body around mine, laying her head on my chest.
“What can I do?” I ask in a soft voice as I cradle her head. I press my lips into her forehead and hug her tighter.
“I don’t know.” Her voice is so small. So quiet.
“Do you want to talk about it?” While I don’t know the specifics, I overheard Ethan telling Elias a bit of what happened before the spider incident. All I know is that it was something that involved her mom.
“I don’t know,” she repeats and sinks further into me, closing her eyes against the world.
“Can I ask you a question about this?” I want to help her, but I don’t want her to talk about it if she’s not ready. I don’t even know if this is my place considering everything, but I have a need to be here for her. To help her get back to herself.
“Sure,” she answers quietly.
“What about her makes you feel this way?” She sniffles and my heart aches with the knowledge that the question caused her pain.
“Everything,” her voice breaks. I stroke her hair and let her cry into me, letting everything out that she needs to. “She makes me feel worthless. I’m a grain of sand and I don’t matter to her. I don’t matter to anyone,” she sobs.
I sit both of us up, frame her face with my hands, and wipe the tears from her face. “You matter to me,” I say firmly. “Avery,youmatter. You are everything and I…” I hesitate. Afraid to admit anything, but looking at her now, her face streaked with tears, I realize I don’t want her to go anywhere else. “She may not see it, honey, but I do. I see you just as you see me.”
Her hands come to my wrists and she closes her eyes against my words like she isn’t sure she wants to hear them or believe them even.
“Your mom is wrong and she doesn’t deserve a daughter like you. You are beautiful and kind, bright and courageous. You may think you don’t matter, but you are wrong. You matter to your friends. You matter to the people you have met here. You matter tome,” I say again before talking myself out of it, because it’s the truth. And the truth is what she needs right now. “I am completely lost for you, Avery Reid. And I don’t plan on finding my way back.”
She finally opens her eyes and looks at me with a soft smile and I am not prepared for her to throw her arms around me, but she does and I am there to catch her. I’ll always be here to catch her. She hugs me tightly and I embrace her back with everything I have, because what I said is true. I’m lost for her and the emotion in my chest is one I can’t deny anymore.I love youare the words I do not say.
It’s not the right time for them, but once I admit them to myself, there is no way I am letting her go. I squeeze her tighter before loosening my grip and bringing my forehead to hers. I brush the strands of hair sticking to her face and lean in to kiss her. She closes the distance quicker than I expect and I let out a small chuckle at her enthusiasm. There she is.
My sunshine.
We fall back, deepening the kiss before I stop her and tuck her back into me, letting her rest there. I remember my emotions being everywhere when Sarah died and it was always exhausting. Avery’s tired eyes show that exhaustion. She needs sleep and as much as I’d like to do other things, her well-being is more important.
But we still have a week left before she leaves and I’ll be damned if I let her spend them in a dark place. It is time to go find a flashlight.
As I rollup the gravel drive, I can hear 80’s rock blasting from the garage, signaling that Axel is in there working. Typically, if his dad is working, there will be nothing but country music playing on the speakers, but with Axel it’s always classic rock.
Once I’m close enough to the open garage, I honk my horn, which is followed by a loud clanking sound and a curse close behind.
Laughing with the knowledge that Axel probably just hit his head on something, he comes out and greets me with his middle finger.
“Come on man, how many times do I have to tell you not to honk your horn when you get here?”
“Well, if you turn down the music every once in a while, you’d hear me come up the drive.”
“Your dumbass just wants to see how many times I can injure myself.”
I shove my shoulder into him and he wraps his arm around my neck, trying to trap me in a headlock. I shove him off, wrestling him to the ground and we act like rowdy teenagers until his dad shuffles out from the corner office and yells from the garage. “Boys, knock it off! You act like you two aren’t grown ass men.”
“Sorry Mr. Wyatt.”
He shuffles his way slowly back inside to the small office. After he plants himself in front of the computer, I turn to Axel. “I need help.”
“With?” He responds, motioning me to follow him into the garage. He grabs a wrench and goes back to working on a red Toyota car he has jacked up.
I rub the back of my neck and let out a sigh, bracing myself for his judgment. I fill him in on the last few days with Avery. From the first moment we met at Fran’s to the brunch at Mom and Dad’s.
“You gotta take her on a date, man.”
