Page 60 of Artfully Wild
“I…I don’t like heights. I never have.”
“But…” she hesitates and I think I know what is going through her head. All the times we have gone rock climbing, seeing which one of us could get the highest—it was always her. Or the times we have gone on long hikes to get to the highest peak we could for some of the best views of the Cascades. If I could see her eyes behind her goggles, I think I’d see hurt flash across them, because…well, because I’ve lied to my best friend all these years. It was something that felt so trivial over time. Just a fear I kept hidden to spend time with my best friend, doing the things she loved even though I was afraid.
“All the shit we’ve done together over the years…the hiking, the rock climbing, right fucking now? You’re seriously admitting to me right now that you are terrified of heights when we are about to go skiing down a fucking mountain and are currently a hundred feet in the air?”
“I understand the irony of the situation at hand, but please do not remind me how high up we are,” I wince at the look on her face and brace for the punch I know is coming. She delivers with one on my bicep that I barely feel through all the layers.
“Why thefuckwould you do all that stuff if you were fucking terrified the whole fucking time?” she almost yells. “Why go rock climbing? Why hike so high? You’ve climbed the tree in my yard for fuck’s sake. You’ve gone everywhere. Why would you do all of that if you’re terrified?” By the end of her rant, her voice has gotten quieter to almost a whisper. “Why would you do all that?” she repeats.
Lifting up my goggles and placing them on top of my helmet, I let her look at me, look into my eyes, because the answer should have been obvious and the way she lets out a small “oh” tells me she realizes it now.
The lift continues its agonizing climb and I straighten my spine, braving my fear. Ignoring it, really. “Because of you.”
She exhales long and slow, all of the breath leaving her lungs in a long stream of air, like a small dragon perched on her shoulder, breathing out smoke.
“Because of me?” she asks, like she either isn’t sure she heard me right or just wants to hear me say it again.
“Because of you.”
“Well, fuck,” she mutters.
And before either of us can say anything else, she kisses me. Hard and fast. It’s the kind of kiss where I am completely overcome with everything I have felt for this woman for years. My heart is full with so much love, I am not sure where it holds it all. All I know is, it’s soaring. Her breath hitches and she breaks the kiss first, resting her gloved hands on my face.
“Such a way with words, little sparrow.”
She rolls her eyes—or I assume she does, because I still can’t see them—and glances forward at the people ahead of us pushing off the seat of their lift. “We better get ready to get off.”
“One more thing,” I say, pulling my goggles back down over my eyes before we reach the point where we have to get off.
“What?”
“Tell meyoursecret,” I challenge.
“I don’t have secrets.”
I point an accusatory finger at her. “Thatis a lie and we both know it.”
Suddenly, she pushes off the lift, causing me to follow her, and plants her left foot across her path so she doesn’t start down just yet. Looking back, she grins. “I hate cats,” she says before she pushes off with her ski poles, leaving me behind with a confession way worse than my own.
“I’m sorry, youwhat?” I yell, coming to a stop in front of her, failing at my attempt to spray her with snow.
“Oh hey, you made it down. I was afraid, you froze up there in fear,” she teases.
“Low blow, Waters,” I joke back. “At leastI’mnot terrified by a soft, furry kitten.”
“Hey, I never said I was scared of them,” she corrects. “I just said I don’t like them.”
“Um, no no no, you said youhatethem.”
“Okay, yes. I hate them. Iloathethem actually.”
“You know I’m a vet, right?”
“And?”
“I cannot believe you are telling me, a man who works with, and has not one, butsixcats who take up basically the whole bed, by the way, that you hate cats?”
“Yes,” is all she says before she uses her ski pole to press down on the levers behind her feet to release her boots from the skis’ binding.
