Page 26 of Save A Horse
“I don’t know. I think mine’s bigger.”
Of course, mine was bigger. It had to be so much bigger than the rock Daisy was holding because of all the love I had for her. She was everything to me. She just didn’t know it yet.”
? ? ?
The sun was beaminginthrough the window and I lay on my bed, thinking of Daisy and wishingthatthis migraine wouldease.Daisy hadbeen hard at workthe last few days, even more so since before the argument. I knew what she was doing. She was running away from her problems instead of facing them head-on. That was typical character for her, but Iwasn’tgoing tosay anything about it. I knew better. I lay therea whilelonger andcouldn’tscratch the feeling in my chest. I needed to see her, and with my dad being gone and not coming back for a while, this was my perfect opportunity.
I stepped out on the porch, looking around. Ididn’tsee Daisy anywhere, which usually meant only one thing. With my hands in my pockets, I made my way to the barn. Once I got into the line of sight, I could see her. I took her in as I walked, seeing her perfect curves andthe wayher body fit in those jeans. She was a sight for sore eyes.
Still, I was uneasy.
“Hey, Daisy. Can we talk for a minute?”I was so nervous that I thought I might faint, but I had to have this conversation, and it had to be now. Itcouldn’twait any longer. Time was up. She nodded.
“Sure.”I rolled my neck from one side to the other, breathing out. After all this timehas passed, I should know what to say by now. I should have it all planned out.
“Iwanted to talk to you about all this.”
“Okay?”
“This is my fault, and I own up to that.”Boy, was I stating the obvious.
“Okay.”
“Daisy, could you stop it with the okays? I want you to know why I promised my dad what I did.”Gosh, she was so infuriating sometimes.
“Alright.”I rubbed my head with frustration. She crossed her arms and continued.“So, why did you promise him that?I mean, do you have any idea how that made me feel? Andyoutelling me that after the night we had…itjustfelt like you were trying to put distance between us. Idon’tlike that. Idon’twant there to be any distance between us.”I tried to respond, but Icouldn’tget the words out.
“It’snot like that. I just…this place is my life.It’smy legacy, too, not just his. I want to take over someday. You know that. At the time, you and Ihadn’tspoken since right before your mom died, and I barely thought we would talk and be able to get along again once you got here…at least not like when we were kids. And I definitelydidn’texpect anything else. I figured work was allboth of uswould be doing this summer.”
“So that makes it okay? Youdidn’tthink about how this could affect me.”Her words were breaking me.
“You’reright. Ididn’t. I thought it would be good for both of us, you know…to not have anything complicate you being here.”
“Good for both of us?”She was mad, her voice getting louder. At least my dadwasn’there to hear this.“It seems like you were making decisions for me, like Icouldn’tmake themon my own. Youdidn’tconsider how I would feel at all.”I could hear the catch in her throat as she spoke. I stepped closer, wanting to touch her, but she rejected my embrace.
“I’m sorry, Daisy.”
“That’sall you keep saying, Colt.”
“Because Idon’tknow what else to say. Ididn’tmean to hurt you. I care about you so much. I always have. But Ican’tlet my dad down.It’sjust...complicated.”I wish she wouldjusttell me what she wants…what she needs.I’lltell her anything she needs to hear to get us back tothe waywe were. I just can't lose Daisy again.
“Complicateddoesn’teven begin to describe this. I know youdon’twant to upset your dad, Colt. I know that. But wheredoes that leave me? Where does that leave us?”I knew she was hurt, and this was breaking my heart so much to see her in this kind of pain. I wanted it to end.
“Daisy…”
“Spit it out already, Colt, becauseI’mgetting tired ofhearing I’msorry. Give me more than that.”
“Ihad feelings for you as a kid, and I have feelings for you now.”I had finally confessed the feelings I had buried deep inside. It felt like a proclamation.
“You had feelings for me back then?”I nodded. I waited to see if she would say anything, but shedidn’t, so I continued.
“Idon’twant to pick a side, Daisy. I want to find a balance. We can figure this out together, butthere’ssomething I have to do first.”I wanted her…right then,right there, right now.
“In the middle of a conversation like this, what could you possibly have to do?”I came so close to her, whispering in her ear.
“This.”
I cupped her face into my hands, bringing her lips to meet mine. I wanted every ounce of herat thismoment, and nothing was about to stand in my way. I backed her against the barn doors. I kissed her, starting from her neck and working my way down to her lips. They were still as soft as ever.
