Page 80 of Say You Remember Me
But she just shook her head, her eyes downcast. “Maybe some other time. I-I’m really tired, Ian. I think I’ll just head to bed.”
I wanted to argue, to say something that would make her stay and let me fix this. But the exhaustion in her voice left no room for debate. So I quietly said, “Okay,” before stepping back so she could disappear into her room.
The door clicked shut, the sound far too final. I stood there for a long moment, staring at the closed door, frustration clawing at me.
Slade and his big, stupid mouth.
Why hadn’t I stopped him sooner? Why hadn’t I been more careful in my past? My careless, reckless choices, always chasing the next thrill, had come back to haunt me.
And now, Maddie was on the other side of that door, hurting.
Because of me.
I went to my own suite, frustration simmering under my skin. Tossing my tie onto the dresser, I sank onto the edge of the bed, running a hand through my hair.
Had I just lost any chance I had at starting something real with Maddie?
27
MADDIE
The light streamingthrough the hotel curtains didn’t feel as cheerful as it should have when I woke the next morning. I blinked against it, my head pounding slightly from the restless night I had. Sleep had come in fits and starts, my mind replaying Slade’s words over and over again like a broken record.
But even though all I wanted to do was stay in bed a little longer, I had to get up. Get up and face Ian and all the people at the conference who, after hearing Slade’s words at the mixer, now probably thought Ian had only gotten engaged because I was supposedly pregnant.
Yay…it was like my senior year of high school all over again.
Dragging myself out of bed, I shuffled into the bathroom, flipping on the light. The reflection in the mirror stopped me cold. My eyes were swollen, puffy reminders of how hard I’d cried the night before. I pressed my fingers lightly under them, wincing at the tenderness.
Slade’s voice echoed in my mind. His thoughtless laughter. The cutting way he’d joked about Ian’s past escapades andthrown in that awful comment about the “nightmare” of getting stuck with a baby.
I gripped the edge of the counter, the sting of those words settling heavy in my chest.
Did Ian feel that way, too, then?
Hehadsaid before that birth control was always important to him, that avoiding fatherhood too early had been a priority. At the time, I’d thought he was just being responsible—kind, even—when he comforted me after I shared my fears about Jaxon feeling trapped by my pregnancy with Grant.
But had Ian been judging me all along? Thanking his lucky stars that he hadn’t ended up with someone like me?
The thought cut deeper than I wanted to admit. And honestly, I couldn’t blame him if he had. Not many guys would want to find themselves in Jaxon’s shoes.
I let out a bitter laugh, the sound echoing in the small bathroom. How stupid had I been to get swept up in the romantic whirlwind of this week? To think, even for a second, that Ian might actually want something real?
He wasn’t going to settle down. Not with me. Not with anyone.
I thought of the guilty look in his eyes last night.Pity.That was what it had been. He’d felt sorry for me. Sorry that I’d ever thought I’d have a chance with someone like him.
The realization sent a fresh wave of embarrassment crashing over me, and I dropped my gaze from the mirror.
Oh man, I can’t face Ian today. Not after everything.
Would it be super obvious if I texted him to say I was sick?
Say I needed the morning off to recover—just a little more time to pull myself together?
No. That would only make things worse.
I was here for work, and even if the lines between boss and assistant had gotten incredibly blurry over the past few days, Ian was still my boss and I still needed this job.
