Page 9 of Guarding the Shadows
“Thanks for inviting me, I had a blast. All of you have been so inspiring. I’m looking forward to getting back on stage and doing a few gigs of my own after that.”
“Yeah, music’s an infectious bug, a habit that forms an addiction,” he mused as Raff distracted me by walking past and casting a sideward glance toward me. For most of the day myheart had sat in my stomach because I’d sensed Raff had grown distant. Yet all it had taken was that one look toward me and my heart stalled for a beat.
Levi stopped abruptly, grabbed me by my shoulders and turned me to face him, while the security team checked out the plane. “You’ve been quiet today. Everything alright?”
My eyes tracked Raff over my brother’s shoulder as I watched him climb aboard the plane, but my gaze snapped back to my brother, shocked at the timing of his question. Heat burned in my cheeks and for a split second I thought Levi suspected that I’d caught feelings for Raff.
I creased my brow and did my best to look puzzled. “Yep, why?” I asked, almost cringing because I’d sounded way too chirpy in my reply. A burst of adrenaline flowed through my body, causing me to shake a little because the last thing I’d needed right then was for him to tell me that Bernadette and mentioned something to him.
For a few anxious beats, Levi’s scrutinizing gaze ticked over my face, his mouth twisted in thought, like he was deciding if he believed me. “You sure? You would tell me … if something was wrong, I mean. Yes?”
“Of course I would, but I’m fine. Just tired,” I insisted, conscious not to nod in an over eager way. I managed a weak smile that I imagined showed him how tired I felt. It was then that I knew Bernadette hadn’t uttered a word because Levi was the kind of man who would have said something.
Luckily, at that moment, Bodhi gave the all-clear for the band and us to climb aboard the plane, and Jude called Levi over.
Some of the tension I held in my body dissipated the moment Levi released me and headed over toward Jude. My relief was cut short though, when Bernadette caught up to me while we walked across the asphalt. “You’ve been quiet today.”
Had everyone notice that too?As the band’s PA it was her job to pay attention to detail but when she eyed me curiously, I’d wished that the ground would swallow me whole rather than have another conversation that could possibly be about Raff.
“So, everyone keeps telling me,” I snapped. Realizing how bitchy I’d sounded, I sighed to give myself time to get my feelings in check, then shrugged. “I’m just tired … and ready to get back to Miami,” I mumbled, feeling paranoid around her since our earlier conversation regarding Raff.
“You’ve really made your new condo home,” she stated, smiling.
“I love it,” I agreed, relieved for the change in subject to the beautiful condo that Levi had bought me. It was extra special for being close to our half-sister, Esther, and Jude’s place. I could hardly believe how my life had turned around in such a short time. At first it had felt weird to have family that showered me in love and wanted to take care of me, since I’d been the caregiver to my alcoholic mother for most of my life.
Perhaps that’s why I attached to Raff so easily. Maybe I’d confused his caring, protective attitude for something else. All day I was torn about the tour finishing and not seeing him every day, but I knew it had to end. It was time to get back to building my own career, and I prayed that once I was busy, I’d forget the stupid, girlish crush I had on one of Screaming Shadows’ bodyguards.
The second I stepped on the plane, and I saw that I only had two seat choices left, my nerves ramped up a notch. My attention switched between the one next to Raff and the other that was next to Greg, which was a selection that left me between a rock and a hard place.
“Take the seat next to Raff,” Levi ordered, before I’d decided what would be the lesser of two evils. “The last thing I need is a ride where I can’t relax because Greg keeps hitting on you.”
“I don’t hit on anyone these days,” Greg muttered to Levi, but winked at me as I walked past him in the small aisle just to mess with my brother. Trying not to make a big deal out of Levi’s demand, I approached Raff, flashed him an awkward smile and sat in the seat beside him.
For several minutes we sat side by side, neither of us talking, until the silence between us became unbearable for me. Every other time we’d been in each other’s company we’d had plenty to say, but there had been no mistaking that the vibe Raff had given me all day was different.
At first, I’d thought it was me who was acting differently … that my conversation with Bernadette had made me clam up. But as the day went on, I had to accept that it was Raff who had distanced himself from me.
From the moment I realized that he wasn’t going to make any attempt to talk to me, our forced proximity on the plane began to feel like a special brand of torture. Then, after ten whole agonizing minutes in his presence with his sexy citrus and sandalwood cologne all around me, I couldn’t bear the silence any longer. “You guys were amazing today at the mall. It was a scary situation for everyone.”
Another pregnant pause ensued before he finally said, “Yeah, it was intense, but we handled it.” Right then, the dull bell in the cabin went off, signaling that our plane had reached the required altitude, and the seatbelt sign went off. Raff hurriedly unbuckled his seatbelt and stood up out of his seat, like he couldn’t get away from me fast enough. “Just got to pee,” he said without looking at me, then proceeded toward the front of the jet and into the restroom.
Fighting back panic, I huffed out and grumbled quietly to myself, “Jesus, this is going to be a fun journey home.” Bernadette turned around from her seat next to Korry, raised her brow to question me, and narrowed her eyes. Frustrationtightened my chest, making it harder to breathe and I shook my head, furious that the comment I’d made hadn’t been as quiet as I thought.
Had I been anywhere else, I would probably have bolted. Obviously, at thirty-three thousand feet I couldn’t do that. So, I did the next best thing by pulling out the small travel pillow from under my seat, placed it behind my head, and shut out the world by closing my eyes.Only four more hours, Beth. You can do this.
A few minutes of deep breathing had just about gotten my heart rate back in check, when the familiar smell of Raff’s cologne, coupled with his big frame blocking the light in front of my eyelids, made it speed up again.
His seat creaked as he sat, then I heard the clunk of his seatbelt when he buckled up again. Taking a deep breath in, he cleared his throat, and my heart thumped loudly in my ears when I thought he was going to say something, however, a sharp blow hit me on the side of my head instead. My eyes flew open, instantly connecting with his when I automatically turned my head to look at him.
For several beats neither of us spoke, then as if he remembered what had just happened, he shook his head. “Fuck, sorry, I was taking my jacket off,” he muttered, after hitting me hard with an elbow. Concern filled his eyes while he reached up, held my head and tenderly stroked his warm thumb over my temple.
His touch was electric and caused a thrill to run through my body and down to my core. The small skin-to-skin contact between us obviously affected him too because I saw his Adam’s apple bob in his throat a time or two.
“Shit, does it hurt? It’s gone beet red. Do you bruise easily?” he asked while his beautiful, worried eyes switched between my temple and my face to gauge my response. The innocent interaction between us shouldn’t have had the effect it had onme, but my heart sped faster each time he stroked his thumb on me.
Once the initial shock of the impact subsided, I shook my head and subconsciously reached for my temple as well. The moment my fingertips connected with his, Raff automatically engulfed my small hand in his much larger one. “I’m such a klutz at times,” he mumbled, wincing in annoyance at himself. “You looked so peaceful sitting there until I came back and tried to knock you out with my elbow.”
I chuckled, conscious the whole time of the swarm of butterflies that had grown in my belly and were fluttering toward my chest. “Trust me, I’m not that fragile,” I remarked, acutely aware that he hadn’t let go of my hand.
