Page 24 of Liquid Courage
Phyllis was not convinced. “You can do better than that, Vivi. What’s the real reason? ‘Cause I know you’re not opposed to one night stands.”
“What makes you say that?”
“Uh, how long have we known each other? And how many times have you stumbled home at seven in the morning after a date?”
“Like… four times!”
“That’s enough to establish a pattern.”
Vivian shoved aside the lingerie bag and kept her head turned away from her sister. “Maybe I want it to be more than a one night stand with this girl. Take my time, you know?”Even though I’m exploding inside.Not the good kind, either. The good kind could only come from Kat’s body. Preferably after their date.Something will have to be really messed up with me tonotfinally sleep with her tomorrow.Now that the poison had been injected into her thoughts, however, Vivian was likely to entertain it long enough for it to fester.
Phyllis studied her for a few more minutes before finally being satisfied with that response. Until she said, “You sure it’s not your self-esteem crashing and burning all around you?” anyway.
Vivian didn’t know what to say to that.
“Sorry.” Phyllis opened a bottle of soda she had bought at the market. Fizz threatened to spill everywhere if she didn’t close the cap again. “Just thinking about some stuff you said before the date. Like how you were worried you looked too skinny in that dress.”
Vivian was still silent.
“Aw, Vivi. I’m sorry. But, hey, if this woman wants to go out with you so much, she must think you’re hot, huh? Because I can say you’re pretty until I’m blue in my face, but I guess it doesn’t mean a thing since I’m your sister and you think I have to say things like that.”
“Well,” Vivian finally said. “You do.”
“I wouldn’t blow that kind of smoke up your ass unless I thought it was warranted. I love you too much to not tell you the brutal truth.”
“What brutal truth?”
“You really wanna hear it?”
“You just said you loved me too much to not let me hear it.”
Phyllis chuckled. “You’re way too hard on yourself and take other people’s opinions too seriously. I know you’ve been through a lot, Vivi, but there comes a point where you’ve gotta know when your shit stinks and when you’re too hot for other people to deal with.”
“Oh my God. You sound so corny.”
“It’s true, though! I don’t want my little sister to go through her adult life thinking that other people’s opinions make or break her self-worth! Hey, take the compliments for what they are, but the criticisms,especiallyabout your appearance, can fuck off. You’re healthy. That’s all that matters.”
Phyllis leaned over and pressed her forehead against her sister’s shoulder.
“Trust me,” she said, “when you were in the hospital, I worried about everything you can imagine. Everything but how you were going to look after it was over. I had no reason to believe you would be anyone but my gorgeous baby sister who makes me insanely jealous.”
“I do not make you jealous!” Vivian hid her blushing behind her lingerie bag.
“Sure you do! You’ve always been prettier than me! Even Mom used to say so!”
“No way!”
“Uh huh. But, even though she used to say that right to my face, I didn’t let it get me too down. It was just her opinion. I’ve had pretty good dating experiences despite me being the not-prettiest sister. So that means two things.”
“Dare I ask?”
“One,” Phyllis placed her finger on Vivian’s nose, “I’m still knock-out gorgeous and you’re stratospherically stunning,andlife really isn’t all that bad. Come on. You can agree with that, right? What’s a couple of bad dates when better ones are always around the corner?”
Vivian couldn’t help but smile. “I’ll concede that I might be pretty, but I amnotstratospherically stunning. That’s how egos swell and bad Instagram careers get started.”
“But you’ll concede that you’re pretty, and this woman is hella lucky to have a date with you tomorrow?”
“Sure.”
Vivian took her things into her bedroom and collapsed upon her pillow and comforters with a loudflop!Her phone was still in her hand when she rolled over and thought about what her sister had said.
“I’ll wear a nice, warm sweater tomorrow,”she texted Kat, who was probably at work and too busy to immediately check her messages.“But you’ll eventually have to take it off and see what I bought at the mall today.”
She left her phone in her bedroom while she took a shower and attempted to think about anythingbuther date the next day. When she returned to her room, she picked up her phone and found a message waiting for her on her lock screen.
“You assume I’ll see it long enough to remember what it looks like.”
The best part? Kat could’ve been talking about Vivian’s underwear… or her body. Both options were utterly delightful.
