Page 74 of Alphas Like Us
His mouth stretches. “I wouldn’t take that long, wolf scout.” But the fleeting smile completely disappears as he processes what he needs tosay.
His gaze slowly rises to meet mine. “See, you’re twenty-two and I’m only your first—and there is better than me out there. Shit, even Oscar is waiting for you to realize it, and I’ve dumped my fair share of guys. For the first fucking time, I’m the one terrified…” He stops himself short, eyeing me hard. “You lookpetrified.”
I clear my throat. “This is me looking nervous,” I tell him, my brows cinched and eyes a bit wide. I’m actually scared to losehimin this wholeconversation.
Maybe that’s why we prefer joking around than having serious talks. It always takes us a while to reach the center, but we usually find away.
His smile starts widening to new profound levels. “I’ve seen you nervous plenty of times. That’s notit.”
“Notplentyof times,” I retort. “Sometimes, afewtimes…no times. Less thanyou.”
Farrow laughs, and then as the sound quiets, our eyes melt against eachother.
“There’s no one better than you,” I tell him, assured about this. “And I get why you haven’t brought this up before.” I nod to myself a few more times, and I stopthere.
Farrow waves meonwards.
I feign confusion. “Isn’t it your turn? Pretty sure it’s yourturn.”
He rolls his eyes, but they land on me as he says, “So you must know you’re brick-walled when it comes to future shit, particularlyourfuture.”
I nod strongly. “Highly aware.” I think about how to say this perfectly, but I don’t think there’s a perfect way. “I always thought I’d never be in a relationship….for as much as I overanalyze my life, I never let myself imagine a boyfriend, let alone somethingmore…”
Farrow props his elbows on the shelf behind him. “I figured, but you realize you’ve had me for a while. Fuck, anytime I mentioned marriage, even jokingly, you looked ready to piss yourpants.”
I grimace. “DidI?”
“You did,” henods.
“I’m not right now.” I rake my hand through my thick hair—a pained groan tangles inside my throat.That fucking hurt.A sharp pang stabs my bone.Even raising my goodhand pulls my bad shouldersometimes.
“Careful,” Farrow whispers, concern deepening hisvoice.
Something swells in my chest, but I continue on. “I guess I didn’t want to think about it before,” I explain, “because thinking meantoveranalyzingand for once, I just wanted to live in the present. Withyou.”
Farrow nods slowly. Understanding in hiseyes.
“But after the crash, I’ve been thinking a lot more about the rest of my life. Where I go from here, and now I can’t stop thinking about us andit.”
“Marriage,” he says matter-of-factly.
“Marriage,” I say with stubborn emphasis, not allergic to the word. “Yeah. I keep thinking…” I gesture to my head, more careful this time. “Do you even want to be married someday? Maybe you’re not into it, maybe that’s why you rejected your ex’sproposal—”
“No,” Farrow cuts me off, his foot kicked back on the shelf. He looks cool even when we’re discussing life-altering, earth-changing topics. “Man, I want that commitment one day. I just didn’t want it withhim.”
So he’s intomarriage…
“Maximoff.” He catches my attention before I stare into space, and he’s already straightened up, no longer lounging against the shelves. He nears until our legs knock together, his fingers toy with hooking myfingers.
And he asks, “What do you want, wolf scout?” He clutches myhand.
What do Iwant?
I can almost feel the rain from the crash site. Water kissing my face and how Farrow hovered over me. How he painted a picture of our lives together. Decades,longer—which, for Farrow, means an expanse of time that lastsforever.
I could’ve died happy inside that future, and I can’t think of a greater sign thanthat.
So I know… “I want everything you said in the rain. All ofit.”
