Page 140 of Save You
After school, I can’t get out of the building fast enough.Hands in pockets, I hurry outside, eyes fixed straight ahead.
Percy opens the car door for me and I mumble “thanks” as I get in.
Lydia is already there, looking exactly how I feel.
I let myself sink back, shut my eyes, and lean my head against the seat.
“Tiring, huh?”I hear Lydia say quietly.
I hate how cautious her voice is.Like she’s afraid even to speak to me.I know that that’s my own fault, but at the same time, I’m aware of how screwed up it is that my own sister no longer dares talk to me.I eye the minibar.I’ve gone a long time without a drink, but after that shit day, the need to numb my senses—no matter how—is taking hold.
I don’t answer, just reach forward and open the little door.But before I can reach for the bottle, Lydia grabs my wrist.
“You’re not getting off your face now just because you’ve had a crappy day,” she says, keeping her voice deliberately calm.
She’s right; I know that.But I ignore her and try, gently but firmly, to prize her hand away.No such luck.She’s got her fingers dug into my arm.I jerk it away from her.Lydia slips forward, catapulting her bag onto the floor of the car.
“Idiot,” she snarls, immediately starting to pick up her stuff, which is now all over the place.
I sigh and bend down to help.“Sorry.I didn’t mean for that to happen.”
Lydia presses her lips together as she gathers her belongings, her movements jittery.I pick up a couple of pens and hold them out to her.She takes them without looking at me.Then I pick up her planner, a few tampons, and a round white plastic tub thatlooks like it’s got chewing gum in it.The lid has come loose and I’m about to close it properly when I catch sight of the label.
Prenatal Vitamin Supplements: Folic Acid, Omega-3 DHA, Calcium, and Vitamin D
Lemon, raspberry, and orange flavor
It also features a picture of a woman’s silhouette as she holds her rounded bump.
It feels like Percy’s just driven straight over a pothole, but we’re still in the parking lot.Blood roars in my ears.
“What’s this?”I croak, looking up from the tub to Lydia, then back again.
All the blood drains from my sister’s cheeks and she stares at me, wide-eyed.
“What is this, Lydia?”I repeat, my voice firmer this time.
“I…” Lydia just shakes her head.
I read the label again and again.I understand all the words, but they don’t make sense.I look back at Lydia and open my mouth to ask the same question again when…
“They’re not mine,” she blurts.
I breathe out fitfully.“Whose are they, then?”
Now she presses her bloodless lips together.She just shakes her head; the shock in her eyes is enormous.I really don’t want to pressure her, but I need her to know that she can trust me.
“Whatever’s happened—you know you can tell me anything, Lydia.I’m there for you,” I say insistently.
Tears pool in her eyes.She claps her hands to her face and starts sobbing.At that moment, I know.I sense the truth without Lydia having to say a word.Deep inside me, I feel shock, panic, and fear rising up all at once, but I push them down again and breathe in deeply.
Then I come to sit closer to Lydia.“They’re your vitamins, aren’t they?”I murmur.
Her shoulders shake so hard that I can hardly make out her stammered “yes.”And then I do the only thing that makes any sense to me in this situation.I take her in my arms and just hold her tight.
11
James
