Page 3 of Blinded
"Fuck." Kurt shook his head. "Do we know with what?"
"Not yet, but I'll run tests. It was stuck in his right back leg. He probably jammed it deeper as he fell. I doubt Paul or John would have seen it. I haven't looked at Bridger's body yet, but I'm guessing I'll find a dart in him as well."
Maybe that was why I couldn't think straight. I thought it was just the pain, but if I'd been drugged, that explained why I couldn't remember anything. What it didn't explain was how Bridger and I didn't smell humans or danger around us. Even at a few hundred yards, if the wind had been right, we should have noticed something.
"Try and stay calm." Cohen's hand stroked over my side. "I need you to relax so you can try to shift. I can work all night and still not heal you the way shifting will. I know you're weak, but as soon as you feel strong enough to shift, I want you to do it."
If I didn't shift, would I die? If so, I wasn't going to shift.
I replayed Cohen's words in my head. 'Eyes were removed. I can't fix what isn't there'. I tried to imagine what I looked like in my wolf form with two hollow eye sockets, then thought about what I would look like as a human.
My stomach convulsed, and without warning, my wolf vomited. I was too weak to do more than let my body do what it wanted, and wetness surrounded the area where my head rested.
"It's okay, that's normal when you've been through trauma." Cohen's voice was so gentle as he lifted my head and started to clean up the mess I'd made.
I wanted to tell him to let me die, but to do that I'd have to shift, then I'd heal, and they wouldn't listen to my pleas. There was no way to win. Now, with the pain eased, even if it was due to drugs, I was sure I wasn't going to die. Staying in wolf form would only prolong the pain and the injuries. My best bet was to shift, then as soon as I was able, take my own life.
I refused to be dependent on anyone. I refused to sit around a hindrance to my pack. At least the elders earned their rest and relaxation by serving the pack the first half of their lives or longer. I wasn't even thirty yet. I hadn't done anything to earn my pack's care.
"I'm going to go out call Bridger's family. I'm sure they felt his death, but I want to be with them when they see the body," Kurt said.
"If I can do anything, let me know." Cohen sounded as if he was across the room.
"I will. For now, just focus on him. I'll find out who he is and contact his pack as soon as I get the information." Kurt sighed. "Just when things were starting to get quiet around here."
"We need to find who did this. I don't care if they are humans." Cohen sounded angry.
"I will. I've got a call for Bayne and a few others to meet with me tonight. We'll start investigating. I've got wolves at the site now, and they'll bring back all the information they can gather."
I heard the click of the door shutting. It was frustrating. I kept trying to look at where the sounds were coming from, at the person speaking, but there was only blackness. Why would someone take my eyes? Why would they kill Bridger, but not me? None of this made any sense.
I took several breaths, debating if I had the energy to shift. I was stronger than I had been when they brought me in, but not much. It had to be because Cohen had controlled my bleeding.
I whimpered, trying to mentally step forward and push my wolf back, but my wolf didn't want to move. He was scared, in protective mode, and wanted to stay in case more danger came.
Trouble was, unless he let me step forward, I wasn't going to be any good fighting. I needed to heal, then we would be stronger, able to do what we needed to, which was end our life.
I gave my wolf a mental shove, forcing him aside as I willed the shift. It took every bit of energy I had left, but slowly my body started to change, my wolf becoming man.
I have no idea how long it took. I was just suddenly aware that I was a man again, and my wolf was pacing in my mind, ready to shift back at the first sign of danger. He was as confused as I was being unable to see, but I depended on his ability to scent danger, letting him forward enough that he seemed pleased to have some control.
"There we go." Cohen sounded close. "Can you tell me your name?"
My mouth was dry, and I licked my lips.
"Here. Take a drink. It will help."
Something bumped against my hand and I felt it, realizing it was a plastic cup. I didn't take the cup, but pushed myself up so I was able to sit, surprised that the pain in my body wasn't worse. Shifting helped, but I'd assumed I was so badly injured it would take longer for everything to heal. Once I was sitting, I reached out, hoping Cohen would offer the glass again.
He did, pushing it gently against my hand. I wrapped my hand around it, carefully bringing it to my lips. The cool water tasted good, soothing the burn that was in my throat.
"Easy, not too much for now." Cohen tapped the cup, making me stop drinking. "Can you talk?"
I nodded, but to be honest, I didn't know if I could. I cleared my throat. "Thank you." My voice was raspy and sounded almost pained.
"You're welcome. I'm Cohen, the doctor for the Terrin Pass Pack."
"Brett." I reached up to touch my face, to feel the area where my eyes should have been.
