Page 43 of Secret
CHAPTER NINETEEN
Noam rolled his shoulders as he headed back to his car. Two nights in a row now he'd been called out to deal with a scene left by the 'Castrator'. He was glad to have the pedophiles off the streets, but damn it, couldn't they work normal hours, so he could get some sleep?
At the rate he was going, he'd be able to cook dinner for Kasey, then he'd fall asleep on the couch while they talked after. Not that he thought Kasey would mind. For once in his life, he was with someone who seemed to be able to deal with what he did. Not once had Kasey seemed to worry about him getting hurt on the job or questioned what Noam did.
His ex hated the fact he was a cop. Noam had been on the streets then, working as a uniformed officer. His ex had given him guilt trips about how he didn't love him enough because he was going out and risking his life every night. Noam hated it, but he put up with it because he didn't think he would find anyone else.
Ended up being a disaster when they broke up because there had been so many issues between them, that when it came to a head, it was an explosive one.
That was one thing he liked about Kasey. There wasn't any tension. They talked about everything, never condemning each other or putting pressure on the other. He didn't think there was anything he couldn't tell Kasey now that he knew his deepest secret.
How refreshing was it that he could admit to his injuries and his headaches, and still have Kasey want him? What were the chances that he would meet someone who didn't like sex? That still amazed him. If Kasey hadn't told him that first, he'd worry that Kasey had said it just to make him feel better, but Kasey had been the one to blurt it out before knowing anything about his injuries.
He couldn't stop thinking about Kasey. Even now, after leaving a horribly violent scene where one of the rookies had stepped on the man's detached cock, he still wanted nothing more than to pick up the phone and call Kasey. He wanted to go home, get into something comfortable, and talk about his night, share everything with Kasey, hoping he understood his need to unleash all the gruesome details to someone because keeping them inside was slowly eating him up.
He could talk to the other detectives, the officers who also reported to the scene, but no one ever liked to show that the job was getting to them. It was like talking to the department psychologist, you felt as if you were weak if you were to go see her unless it was an order that you spend an hour with her due to protocol.
Did he dare talk about active cases with Kasey, share the horrors he saw with him? Of course, he'd tame them down some, he wouldn't give all the details, but even just getting a little of it off his chest would help.
He glanced at the clock on his dashboard, seeing it was almost two in the morning. He wondered if Kasey was home from work yet. He hated that they worked different hours. It wasn't a huge deal now, but the more their relationship grew, and the more nights they hopefully spent together, it would mean going to bed alone a lot. Still, he hoped that they got to the point that he could give Kasey a key and have him sneak in after work and crawl into bed beside him.
He pulled up in his driveway and into the garage, parking. It was late, but if Kasey was up, he wanted to talk. A text probably wouldn't wake him if he was asleep already.
Hoping for a response, he quickly typed out a text.
Hey, you still awake?-Noam
He shoved his phone into his pocket and headed into the house, pausing to pet Casper before heading down the hall to the bedroom. He'd just finished getting undressed when his phone beeped. He glanced down at the screen and smiled seeing Kasey's response.
I was just about to head home. What are you still doing up?- Kasey
I got called out on a crime scene. Just getting home myself. Call me?-Noam
It didn't take ten seconds before his phone was ringing. "Hello?"
"Hey, I didn't think I'd be able to say goodnight to you tonight. This is a nice surprise." Just the sound of Kasey's voice took the stress of the day away.
"Was a long night. Just needed to hear a friendly voice." Noam sank down on the bed. "How was your night?"
"It was a long one. I'm glad it's over. You okay? You sound down."
Noam sighed as he leaned back against the pillows, watching Casper on the bed beside him. "Yeah, I'm good. Sometimes the job gets to you. You can't unsee things, ya know?"
"Yeah, I can imagine. I'm here if you ever need to talk about things," Kasey offered.
How did he know? Were they that connected already that Kasey could tell he needed to talk or was it just wishful thinking and Kasey was just saying what would sound polite? Noam closed his eyes. "Do you need to be home?"
"No." Kasey's voice was soft. "Do you want me to come over now?"
"If you aren't too tired." Noam took a deep breath, wondering what the hell he was doing. Inviting him over at two in the morning wasn't smart. He had to be up at six, work by eight, still, the thought of just holding Kasey, talking to him, just taking a few minutes to forget work, forget what he'd seen was too tempting.
"I can be there in ten minutes." Kasey didn't sound upset about the unexpected request.
"Thanks, I'll watch for you."
"See you soon." Kasey hung up.
Noam set his phone down, taking another deep breath. What was happening to him? He had never been a needy person, never unloaded his stress or worries on others. He had gotten used to shouldering things. The relief he felt at Kasey coming over was unnerving. He didn't like depending on anyone, but right now, he needed to just hold Kasey in his arms for a few minutes before they parted ways again.
