Page 30 of Caged
"What else have you been doing?"
Danny smiled. "I'm helping Marshall paint his basement and he's going to teach me how to put up walls in one of the other areas. We play a lot of video games too, and he's teaching me how to use his computer."
"Do you like that?"
"Yeah. I can look up everything on there. I missed so much, but I can just type in a year and see what happened. I feel like I missed things I need to know."
"You did. You missed a lot of growing up in the way most boys grow up. You still grew, but you didn't have the experiences most of us did. That's got to be hard. Maybe makes you feel like you have a lot of catching up to do, but I don't think you do."
"You don't?"
"Nope. A lot of those experiences don't really matter and are part of being a certain age. The time's come and gone already for you to do those things. I think you're better on focusing on the man you are now, the person you grew up to be, and making new experiences from now on. You can't go back, only forward."
"But how will I know what everyone else knows?"
"You'll learn it. You'll experience it. There's no reason you can't go to school and learn things. You said yourself the internet is amazing. I did half my schooling online. It was better than having to be stuck in a stuffy classroom all of the time." Gary got up and went to a cupboard under his bookcase. "Would you like a drink? I have soda, water, or I can make coffee if you like."
"Water, please. My stomach is still adjusting to all the other stuff."
"Guess that means you didn't eat well while being held?"
"Mostly oatmeal once, sometimes twice a day."
"Yuck. That would get old fast." Gary handed him a bottle of water. "Mind if I sit at the other end of the couch?"
Danny shook his head as he twisted the cap off the bottle.
"So, since we'll be meeting here twice a week, is there anything you want to talk about now?"
Danny shrugged, then lifted his gaze to meet Gary's. "I don't know what to talk about. I don't want to talk about Larry or the time I was held."
"Okay, then we won't. So that means you want to talk about things going on now, how you're adjusting?"
"Yeah. I want to talk about feeling normal, not being scared. I want to get a job, make some money so Marshall doesn't have to take care of me. I want to learn to drive."
"Good goals. Doable goals." Gary opened his can of Coke. "What is normal to you? What would make you feel normal?"
Danny had thought about this a lot. "Not having everyone know who I am or what happened to me. Not having people feel sorry for me, or worse, blame me."
"Who is blaming you?" Gary's voice was a bit louder with the question.
"No one yet, but I'm sure they will. I saw some of the stuff online. People saying that I liked it and that's why I stayed so long. Others saying I was paid to do those things."
"People can be mean, and online, they are even meaner. They say things there they'd never dare say to your face. Don't go looking online at all the lies and stuff. If you have to look, stick to real news sites. You do know that you're not to blame, right? This wasn't your fault."
"Everyone keeps saying that."
"You don't believe them?"
"If I hadn't gone with Larry to play with the puppy, he wouldn't have taken me."
"You know that's not true. I mean there's a chance he wouldn't have, but there is also a chance that he would have just found another way. In my experience, most pedophiles pick who they want. They take the time to watch your routine, see where you will be, and plan out a way to take you. I'm guessing if the puppy hadn't worked, he would have tried again some other way." Gary frowned. "People like him are criminals who know what will happen if they get caught. They have a plan. Very few act without thinking. I bet when he took you, he had the house all set up and ready for you. He knew what he needed to prepare before he got you there."
Danny had never thought about that, but it was true. The locks were in place, the windows had been cemented in. Everything was prepared. "You're right. I never thought about that before. Do you think there were others before me?"
"We have no way of knowing," Gary said softly. "So, our hour is almost up. Was today as bad as you thought it would be?"
Danny smiled. "No. I thought you'd force me to talk about everything."
