Page 49 of A Touch of Murder
"I wish there was more I could do to help. I wish we had something of the men's that I could read." Adam hated the stress he saw on Barret's face when he talked about the case.
"I wish there was something any of us could do. Right now, all we can do is sit and pray for something to break. I just pray they aren't out there killing others while we hunt for them." Barret met Adam's gaze. "I missed you this week. I thought about calling, but it was so late when I finally got home."
"You can call me anytime." Adam reached out a gloved hand and rested it on Barret's arm.
Barret stared at his arm for a moment, then slowly reached up and started to remove the glove from Adam's hand. "Stop me if you don't want this."
Adam took a deep breath, hoping this wasn't going to backfire. The last thing he wanted was to lose Barret's friendship because he ended up seeing something Barret wanted to keep secret. "It's okay." He wiggled his fingers and helped Barret remove the glove.
Barret set the glove aside, then linked their fingers. He only held on for a few seconds, but it was enough for several images to race through Adam's mind. He saw Barret at what must have been his desk at the station, eating donuts, laughing at something someone said. Then he saw him running up one of the trails in the area. He was wearing shorts and was shirtless, sweat beading on his forehead.
Adam blinked, then smiled as Barret pulled his hand back. "We should go running together one weekend when things slow down."
"I'd like that, but you don't need to tell me what you see. I don't care what you know about me. My goal with this," Barret trailed his fingers over the back of Adam's bare hand, "is to maybe get you to the point where the visions are secondary to my touch. I want you to focus on holding my hand, not what you see when you're doing it. I know it might take time. Hell, it might never happen, but just know you don't have to comment on what you see unless you really want to."
"I'd like to get to that point too. I want to enjoy our touch, Not worry about what I'm seeing because of it. I don't know if it's possible or how long before I might find a way to ignore the visions, but I'd like to keep trying. It's been a very long time since anyone's touched me because they've wanted to," Adam admitted as he turned his hand over and took Barret's hand in his again. He tried to keep his attention on the man in front of him and not the images that flashed through his mind.
"I'd like to do a lot more than hold hands eventually, but I get that it could take some time before we're ready to explore more than this." Barret gave his hand a squeeze, then pulled it back. "A little at a time as you get used to it. I don't want to overwhelm you."
"I'm okay." Adam closed his eyes for a moment. "The visions are there, but I'm also very aware of you and your touch and that's it's not for work. It's not to read what I see. When I'm working, my whole focus is on the vision, but with you, I'm able to pull back a bit and let the visions play more in the background. It's still overwhelming and distracting, but it's a start. If you can be patient with me, I'd like to keep doing this. Maybe in time it will get easier, or I'll find a way to ignore the visions and give you the attention you deserve."
"I'm happy just taking things as they come. No rush, no worries. You let me know when you're ready to sit and hold hands for a while or if these simple brushes of touch get to be too much. I'm following your lead here." Barret took a drink of his beer. "Want to come over next Saturday and help me try to do pulled pork on that smoker?"
"I would love to. Now that I know you have the smoker, I'm going to have to find all kinds of fun things we can cook." Adam was more than happy to give up his crockpot occasionally.
"I'd use it more if I was home, but some things take hours. Once my schedule gets back to normal, we can do a lot with it. We might even combine using it and your crockpot in time."
Adam laughed. "We'll make a good team."
"We already make a good team." Barret stood. "Want another beer?"
"No, I have to work tomorrow as well. Just not as early as you. I think I'll head home and let you get some sleep. What can I help clean up?" Adam stood as well, slowly sliding his glove on.
"Nothing. Becky and Francine did most of it. I'll worry about cleaning the grill later."
"Let me at least take your trash out so the bears don't end up in your yard." Adam tossed his empty bottle in the trash can, then pulled the nearly full bag from it and tied it off. He set it by the back door to grab on his way out. He turned back to Barret and was surprised to find him standing directly behind him.
"Thank you again for coming." Barret reached up and caressed a finger down Adam's cheek.
"Thank you for the invite and the amazing food." Adam's pulse raced at the closeness and the look of intent in Barret's gaze.
"Just testing the waters here." Barret closed the distance between them and kissed Adam softly on the lips.
It was just a quick kiss, nothing very intimate, but it had Adam's body coming alive. Yes, there were visions—something of Barret riding a motorcycle—but Adam pushed it back and let himself focus on the way he could still feel Barret's lips on his. He wanted more but knew it was too soon. It would be too much, and he didn't want to deal with that tonight when they were saying goodnight for the evening. That was something they'd explore more when they had time and neither of them had to be up early the next morning.
"Was that okay?" Barret asked.
"Very okay." Adam nodded.
"Good. We'll try it again soon." Barret stepped back and turned to open the sliding screen door that led into the house. "Leave the trash. I'll throw it out before I go to bed. Let me walk you to your car." As they walked into the house, Barret handed Adam the bowl he'd brought with pasta salad. The women had washed it and set it on the counter when they'd been cleaning up. "I want that recipe."
"It's easy. I'll come over and teach you one night," Adam told him as they headed out the front door. It was already dark, and Adam glanced up, taking in the sky filled with shimmering stars. "That is one of the things I love about living here. I never got a view like that while in the city."
"I feel the same way. There is nothing better than sitting out under the stars. Something else we'll have to do one night when we're free."
"Camping?" Adam asked hopefully. He loved going camping but had no one to go with. He'd tagged along with Jacey and his family once, but there were too many people. It hadn't been relaxing at all.
"Yeah, if you enjoy that?"
