Page 185 of Keeping Kasey
“Here’s what I know.” I lift my hand to tick off each point. “Kasey and I used to sleep together. She lied to me and left. I hunted her down, shot her only friend, and kidnapped her. She hates me, and too much has happened for that to change.”
“Have you even asked for forgiveness?” she asks, and my chest aches.
“I can’t,” I say on a resigned exhale.
“Why not?”
For reasons I cannot articulate, I tell my sister the truth.
“Because she might give it to me.”
Elise doesn’t ask the question, but her expression does.
“I wanted to kill Kasey the day I found out she lied. I was so damn angry. Then I spent months terrorizing her and treating her so horribly, only to find out that if I’d takenhalf a minuteto listen to her, I might’ve saved us both from…” I shake my head. “I can’t apologize. I can’t ask for forgiveness because there’s a chance she will give it to me, and I can’t even forgive myself.”
Elise stands, rounding the desk with her perfectly sympathetic expression. She covers my hand with her own, and I let her—not hating the comforting touch.
“Kasey is not blameless, Logan. She could’ve told you the truth, and she chose not to. She could’ve sent you a letter or message explaining everything after she was gone. Instead, she chose to stay silent and disappear.”
“I thought you wereTeam Kasey. Now you’re against her?”
Elise rolls her eyes. “I’m just saying that you both hold blame for what happened.”
“And if that’s true, then what hope is there?” I ask with a humorless laugh. “If we just hurt each other and screw up over and over again, how can we ever make it work?”
Elise laughs, a knowing smile touching her lips. “Lifeis screwing up over and over again. Love is fighting for each other anyway.”
When I don’t answer, she pats my hand and moves to the door.
“I know you’re a grown man who doesn’t need the advice of his little sister, but since you’ve indulged me this long, the last thing I’ll say is that I want you to be happy. Whatever that looks like.”
The door slams shut behind Elise, and I see what my happiness looks like with vivid clarity.
Waking up with my arms wrapped around Kasey. Driving to the base with my hand on her thigh. Teasing her until her cheeks turn my favorite shade of red. Meeting every one of her challenges in a battle of wills that ends with us in each other’s arms.
My happiness—mypurpose—is her.
She isn’t a fling gone wrong… she never was.
I fell in love with Kasey four months ago, and I’ve loved her every day since.
Even when I hated Kasey, I loved her.
And I don’t see how I could ever stop loving her.
CHAPTER FORTY-TWO
Kasey
For the first time in months, I woke up without tears wetting my cheeks and a pile of tissues beside my bed.
A seamless transition from sleep to wakefulness.
Logan’s arms were wrapped tightly around me through the night, keeping me safe. The peace his presence alone brought me was comforting beyond anything I could put into words.
And I can’t help but wonder if those tears and tissues will multiply tenfold when I leave again.
It’s all I could think about as we lay in bed this morning.
