Page 29 of It Couldn't Be You
“Yeah,” I admitted.
“I still need a date to the firework show.” If I were Jordan’s friend, I’d tell him he was playing with fire.
I laughed a little. But then, I got choked up.
I sniffled. “I don’t know, Jordan.”
“I hear you sniffling over there. Are you okay?”
“Yeah.”Can you come over and talk?
“I can listen to some of those thoughts rolling around in your head. I know you always have a lot of those.”
“I honestly want a break from my thoughts.” My heart ached at his kindness, at how I was letting it go, no longer in the safety net of being one of his girls.
“Do you want me to come over?” he asked.
My heartbeat thudded through my fingertips as it gripped the phone.Yes.I wanted my dear friend back for a little while. I could imagine the heat of his arms, his confident planning for how I’d rebound from this job change, how he’d bring over my favorite kind of coffee like he always did when I was sad, the sweet kind I didn’t always order myself.
But it would be yet another selfish, immature decision. It’d be unfair to him. To me, too.
“I think I’m okay. I’ll probably go straight to sleep after we hang up, actually.”
There was a quiet disappointment on both ends of the phone call.
“I guess it’s just nice to know you miss me, too,” he said quietly.
“It’s nice to know you’re still my friend.”
“Always.” His voice broke, and so did my heart.
We were both just two heartbroken people, used to running to each other on our bad days, used to relying on one another’s arms and ears for comfort. Now we were just awkward silence and aching hearts, tip-toeing around bad decisions. So, we hung up.
My stomach was grumbling. My mind was exhausted. I dropped my phone to the ground. Maybe I’d just fall asleep and wake up in the new year as a new me, I supposed. I closed my eyes but then heard a loud knocking at the door.
Mom?I wondered. Then, my heart started to anxiously hammer away.Jordan?
I rushed to the door, all puffy-eyes and messy hair, to find Katie and Gabriel with Santa hats on and a box of pizza under Gabe’s arms.
Nine
Jordan Boyfriend <3
Happy New Year’s Eve by the way. Always here if you need me.
“Hi,” I said, teeming with gratitude.
“I told Gabe about your bad day,” Katie said. “We both agreed you needed pizza and fireworks. Maybe some wine.”
“Or hot chocolate,” Gabe added.
“Come on in.” I opened the door wider, and the two trailed inside.
“I see a bowl of plain noodles,” Katie called out from the kitchen.
“I hadn’t gotten around to making the pesto yet. I had a couple of phone calls.” I turned to Gabe, who still had the pizza box in his hands. “But this pizza smells so much better than anything I was going to make.”
“Let’s dig in.” Gabe dropped it on the blonde wood kitchen bar.
