Page 54 of It Couldn't Be You
Not for something I’d had before, not like when a memory sent a jolt of missing Jordan through me, but an ache for something I’d yet to ever have myself. Like when your mouth waters at the scent of something baking in the oven. You haven’t tasted it yet, but you’re hungry for it just the same.
My heart was hungry for something. I thought about how my heart hammered like a fist on a door every time Gabriel walked by, every time I breathed him in. But with him, it was never as simple as declaring, “It’s a date.” Never as simple as two eyes agreeing,This is going to be something. Oh, but there was that pang in my chest, all the same. I put my hand on my chest and rubbed it lightly, sending myself a little love.
If only it could ever be that easy for the two of us. In another story, Gabriel and I could meet at a café and get lost in conversation. We would talk and talk, like we do now, easy and passionate, words flowing like a strong current, but then he would ask if I wanted to go grab lunch. I would tell him that I would love that. I would grab my bag. I’d follow him out the door, my heart hammering away in my chest like a fist on a door, telling me,“Open up! Something’s here.”
I shake my head. I take another order. I ignore the ache—the pang—just like I ignore the hammering heart.
While the two were out for lunch, Marianne connected with me through a phone call, and thirty minutes later, she sent me an email offering me my first assignment for an article on a small town in Oklahoma that kind of reminded me of Sweet River, as well as an attached travel itinerary for this weekend.
I squealed in joy. It wasn’t fabulous pay. I had never written a travel article like this, and I’d have to run this by Rose, but it was still a tiny miracle. I stared at the travel itinerary on my phone and heard Katie’s voice say, “Magic.”
Sometimes seemingly mundane things like emails, itineraries, and meetings over coffee were nothing short of magic.
By the time Terrence and Katie returned, hours had passed, and my shift had ended. I stuck around to hear all the details from Katie on their impromptu date. I was eating a cookie on one of the café’s old, fluffy couches, and flipping through an old copy ofLittle Women,wondering if it would be simpler to kiss your sister’s best friend rather than your best friend’s brother, when in strolled Katie with Terrence following closely behind.
“Well, I’m really glad you found your way to Sweet River,” Katie said as the door closed behind them. “Even if it was just for a day.”
“You know,” he said, leaning against the door. “I could stick around. Make tomorrow’s meetings virtual. Maybe you and I could meet up again?”
“You can do that?” Katie asked, her voice hopeful. “Tomorrow is my day off, you know. I’m free all day.”
“I can be free all day if you’re free,” he said, his voice soft. I was slipping down the couch, attempting to hide. My face was red, and I wasn’t even on the date.
“Em?” Katie asked suddenly.
I leaned up on my elbows with my head peeking over the side of the couch. “Oh, hey,” I said, trying to sound casual.
Katie had a knowing look. “Our lunch break ran a little long.”
“It might as well have turned into dinner,” Terrence added with a chuckle.
“I noticed.” I raised my eyebrows.
Then Katie walked back outside with Terrence, I’m sure for a little extra privacy. I looked away but did catch their hands intertwined.
What is going on?I waited around for another hour nearly, as they were still standing outside talking. I finally decided to leave.She’ll call me, I thought.She bettercall me.
She didn’t call until after ten. She explained they decided to just go get dinner, too.
“What is happening?” She howled with laughter. “Who is this man?”
“Canada Man,” I teased.
“Emma, he is a freaking dream. I feel like I could talk to him for hours.”
“Feellike? Katie, you did talk to him for hours. Almost twelve hours straight.”
“I’ve never had a connection like this with anyone. It was like magic. I mean, you saw, he’s really cute. But also, it was a lot more than that. We had a connection right away.”
“I could tell,” I admitted. “I saw it there right away.”
“Right?” she said excitedly. “I shouldn’t get my hopes up. HeisCanada Man. He lives in a different country.”
“Well, don’t end it before it’s even started,” I interjected.
“But isn’t Canada one giant disqualifier?” I could hear her frowning through the phone.
“Maybe it’s not,” I said. “You can’t know that until you two have talked about it. I mean, he seems like he’s kinda in charge of a lot of his work. What’d he say? ‘If you’re free, I can be free.’ Seems like maybe he could be anywhere whenever he wanted.”
