Page 57 of It Couldn't Be You
“Oh,” he said gently. “What’s freaking you out?”
“I’m just a little lost,” I said. “I feel out of my element. I had a whole espresso machine versus drip coffee analogy I used earlier.”
“Yeah, you know, it’s a whole other format, isn’t it? Plus, you just get dropped in this new city, and you have to figure out what you’re looking for—what you want to say about it.”
“Exactly! I’m not used to just dropping into random cities in the first place. And now I’m taking these notes, like an embarrassing number of notes, but they’re just like a bunch of random facts.”
“Our reporter Em with her handy notebook. As you go, you’ll find your own style and voice, of course, but can I tell you what I do?”
“Please tell me what you do.” I said. Katie slipped out of the car to call Rose from my phone.
“I take notes on things like the feelings the places give me, the tastes, the people around me, the weather, you know…what actually makes the trip. Later, you can see what keeps popping up. It’ll tell you a lot about the city and your experience. That’s where the themes and perspectives will also show up—I knowHere & Thereis big on that.”
“Okay, that’s a good tip. I like that.” I felt my shoulders relax. “I’m also feeling kind of stuck with this to-do list that goes with the sponsorship and also the itinerary I have… I’m trying…” But that was all I had. I was just trying.
“I always remind myself—don’t fit the story to the activities but make the activities fit the story,” he said. “You know what I’m saying?”
“I think I do,” I said. “Thank you.” I leaned my head back on my driver’s seat, closing my eyes for a minute. “I think I’ve been making it all about the checklist and the expectations, forgetting I’m hunting for a story and can use all this extra to help to tell that story.”
“There’s my reporter.” His voice was soft like melted chocolate.
“I wish you were here,” I whispered, the words only meant to flitter through my mind escaping from my lips.
“I could be,” he said quickly. His voice was a whisper, too, making my body buzz.
“Really? Would you actually hop on a flight because I’m having trouble with a story?”
“Yes. Definitely. I’d hop on a flight because you were bored and wanted company. I’d hop on a flight because you forgot toothpaste and I had a tube. I’d be where you needed me.”
I laughed. “I don’t know if I believe that.”
“Do you want me there?” he asked, his voice a challenge. A match against a box.
I always want him there, I thought. Then the car door opened.
“You guys still talking?” Katie asked. Her voice was loud and cheerful, like someone turning on the lights on a sleepy gray morning in bed.
“Yeah,” I hiccupped. “He gave me just the advice I needed.”
“Hi, you!” Katie grabbed her phone, turning it onto speaker.
“Hey, Little Sis,” he said coolly. “Well, Em, you’ve wanted to travel and write for forever, just enjoy it. Have some fun. Youlikedoing this, remember?”
“I hope I like doing this,” I said a little cynically.
“Come on, you know you’re excited,” he urged me on.
I nodded. “She’s nodding,” Katie told him.
“You know me, I just get in my head,” I said.
“That’s a good thing. You’re a writer. That’s where you’re supposed to be,” he said, again, just what I needed to hear.
After the phone call with Gabriel, I drove downtown. We just wandered around. If it happened to be on the itinerary, great, but if it didn’t, that was fine too. That became the mindset for the entirety of the trip. I found the first hint of the story, like an outline, as I lay in bed that first night. The rest of my trip, all we saw and did filled in the outline.
I met the people, I ate good food, and I wrote about all of it. I let the hotel clerk guide me more than the to-do list. I learned about the relentless wind that felt like a monument of the city itself, just as much as the downtown statue. I tasted the delectable barbecue sauce that literally everyone in the diner was ordering. I went over to the little church across the street from our hotel that was packed with people coming and going even though it wasn’t even Sunday.
Once I found the story, the to-dos, the activities, and tourist traps fit in easily, helping the narrative as I went, like when you’re falling in love with someone and everything you discover just keeps you falling. The weekend went by quickly, like any good trip. I stayed up writing as Katie slept, but I never felt tired. Maybe I was too happy and wired to notice it if I did.
