Page 37 of Scout Takes the Lead
“Do you think you’re ready to talk to her again?”
I pursed my lips and looked at her. “Have you been talking to her?”
She shook her head. “Not since she called to recommend you. She told me a little about you and how she felt about you, but that’s all.”
“How does she feel?”
“That’s something you should take up with her, don’t you think?”
When I didn’t answer, she said, “When was the last time you had a significant episode?”
I had to think about that, and I realized that I was getting better. I didn’t think I’d ever be fully free, but I was on the road, and much stronger than I’d been even a few weeks before.
“Last week, I think,” I finally said. “Bad dream, but Scout woke me up before I got too deep into it.”
“Keep up the good work, then,” she said.
Scout and I left her office. Dr. Altman hadn’t said so directly, but Grace was her friend, and she wouldn’t be sending me back toward her if she didn’t think I was ready.
I was thinking and wondering and somehow the dog led me to the pet store when I wasn’t paying attention. “You want a new toy, buddy?” I asked as I realized where we were. “Why not? We should do some celebrating.”
Scout and I walked inside and headed to the toy aisle. I picked up a couple of things but he wasn’t interested. I handed him one end of a rubber rope. “Tug of war?” I asked, but he wouldn’t bite. Then he yipped once, and when I looked up I saw Grace there. “Hey,” I said, as I stood up.
“Hey,” she said. Then she leaned down and rubbed Scout’s head, and he smiled happily.
“I’ve been seeing Dr. Altman,” I said. “Thanks for the recommendation. She’s really helped me.”
“That’s good.”
“How about you? How have you been?”
“Not bad. New obedience class. Those two guys with the Papillon who dropped out of your class have come back to try again. The dog sleeps in the bed with them and eats their hair.”
I laughed. “Yuk.” Neither of us said anything for a moment, and then I said, “Dr. Altman asked about you. If I’d seen you recently.”
“So that’s why you’re here?”
“I think Scout led me here. Maybe he wants a new toy. Or maybe...” I had to ask. “Maybe I’d like to ask you for another chance.”
She smiled. “Only maybe?”
“I’m a lot better now. Would you be willing to go on another date with me?” She hesitated for long enough that I thought she was thinking of a polite way to say no, but instead she said, “Sure.”
We made plans to meet for dinner that night at the Greek restaurant on Hollywood Boulevard where we’d eaten before. I was so happy that I leaned over and kissed her cheek. She didn’t seem to mind.
When I got home, I rushed around cleaning up the bungalow. Maybe I was being too optimistic, but I was hoping that the evening might end at either her place or mine, and I wanted mine to be ready for her. I wasn’t a dirty guy, but Scout shed a lot and I ran the vacuum.
It’s funny, the noise was almost soothing to me, whereas when I first came back from Afghanistan I couldn’t stand it. Scout kept moving around the house trying to avoid the vacuum and I had some fun chasing him with it, though I could tell he found it a game rather than a threat.
I spent some time on customer calls, fed and walked Scout. Then I took a shower and got dressed, worrying over what I was wearing like some teenager on a first date. Fortunately, Scout kept me calm, and we walked over to the restaurant.
Despite everything she and I had been through, it felt comfortable seeing Grace by the restaurant door. This time neither of us hesitated, and we kissed on the lips. Nothing super sexy, but a promise of things to come.
The dinner was great, and it felt like we were talking about everything and nothing all at once. We talked about what had happened to us since our last date. About how the world had changed, how I was doing in therapy. We talked a lot about Scout and all the things he liked to do.
By the end of the night, I knew that this time around things would be different. Not only had I gotten better, but Grace seemed different too. She was more understanding of my struggles with PTSD and grateful for the progress I’d made over the past few months.
Then we ended up at her place, and she invited me in. We curled up on the couch together with Scout sleeping between us, feeling both safe and excited at what this new start might bring us. And as I lay there with Grace in my arms, I realized something: no matter how dark things had been before or how much pain either of us had gone through in life, love could still be found in places you least expected it.
