Page 71 of Semi Sweet
“I like a challenge,” Sean said hopefully. When I gave him a look he added, “I’m really excited and I’m not thinking straight.”
This time I nodded and kissed him before I ducked past him and around the car to the passenger side door. Convinced we were going to run down a pedestrian or get pulled over for a speeding ticket, I held onto the handle above the door as Sean frantically drove back to the apartment. Would it be weird if Dan came out to help us? Maybe he’d assume we got stuff for me to live here the next few weeks and would want to help bring it in.
Sean pulled onto the cul de sac and I saw him punch the air excitedly as he must have noticed something the same time I did. The red sedan Dan usually had parked in the driveway was missing.
“Thin floorboards,” he explained as he parked the SUV on the street.
We opened the gate and headed to the back door. I went through first, trying to decide if the bedroom was where I wanted things to go down or if I was too impatient and would settle for the couch, the floor, even.
Bear, who must have realized he was home for the first time in forever, whined excitedly and tried to jump on Sean as he shut the slider behind him.
“Bear,” he said sternly. “Bear, go lie down.”
When the dog totally ignored his owner, I made the executive decision to put a door between us and Bear.
“Which room is yours?” I asked.
Sean was in my wake. “First one on the right.”
Bear plodded along beside us and Sean had to use his leg to prevent the dog from following us into the room before he shut the door behind him. He wiggled his eyebrows at me before I closed the space between us.
We fumbled with our clothes, laughing as we pulled off our shirts and kicked off our shoes. I found I wasn’t struggling with the clasps of my bra or the waistband of my leggings because I was nervous, but because I was trying to take them off as quickly as I could. Would this have been what happened in an alternate universe, one where I hadn’t been with Evan at the time of the disco masquerade?
Sean smirked down at me as he took in my body. I met his gaze, but not before learning what he looked like, too.
“It’s not too late,” he said softly. “To say no, to run out of here screaming. Just giving you the option.”
“You haven’t thought about what it would be like?” I asked him.
“Seriously? I’m a guy.”
I put my arms around his neck. “I’m not going anywhere.”
We went on autopilot. We didn’t speak, but we knew what the other one needed. We kissed, backing up until my legs hit the bed and we tumbled onto it. Sean climbed on top of me, his lips grazing my neck, shoulders, and breasts while I raked my hands through his hair, trying to kiss him back with as much fervor. The lower he touched with his hands or his lips, the more I was convinced I’d done myself a disservice by staying with Evan as long as I had. I was probably going to embarrass myself before Sean thrust a single time. Sure enough, all he had to do was put a hand on my inner thigh and I became a quivering pile of nerves. Sean picked his head up to raise an eyebrow at me.
“Don’t let me stop you,” I panted.
Should I grab onto the sheets now or wait until we were actually in the thick of things? I felt him move his fingers until they finally slipped inside me and I was a mess again. As he slid them in and out of me, I moaned. I vowed I was going to return the favor.
I tried to sit up, grabbing onto his arms and reaching for any bit of bare skin I hadn’t touched yet, but he gently pushed me back onto the mattress. He moved so he could lean over and kiss my lips again.
“Correct me if I’m wrong, but didn’t you say you were giving yourself to me?” he murmured softly. When I nodded with my eyes shut, he continued. “Let me have my fun. How can you make a decision without enjoying everything there is to offer?”
This time I screamed when it wasn’t his fingers, but his mouth between my legs.
***
Eventually he relented, and I was able to have my retaliation. I tried things I hadn’t done in years as well as things I’d never done with anyone before. I touched him and tasted him, surprised by my confidence and forwardness. Was this my sign? It wasn’t awkward. There was a natural give and take. I thought about how I’d been holding back for so long, trying to do the ‘right thing.’ I’d thoroughly decided as I heard him groan and swear that I should have given in a long time ago, or at least as soon as I was free of Evan’s clutches.
“Everyone still having fun?” Sean asked when it seemed we’d both done everything to each other besides the act itself.
I nodded, pulse still racing. This was it. The point of no return.
“How are we doing this?” I asked.
“Ladies’ choice.”
Almost laughing out loud because I’d never been given that luxury before. I requested he lie on his back as I straddled him, a leg bent on either side of his body. I leaned over, grabbing his face gently as I kissed him. I savored the moment, trying to recall every detail of the room, his face, and as I pulled away, his russet eyes–the same eyes I’d gotten momentarily lost in the day I crashed into him at Cash Value Market. How weird to think about where I was now.
