Page 62 of Here We Go Again
She doesn’t stop, even as Logan shouts at her in the middle of the hospital. Her body is on autopilot until she makes it out into the parking lot where the purple clouds from earlier have amassed into a gnarled tangle overheard.
It’s raining, she realizes, as it begins to soak through her dress.
“Hale! What are you doing? Where are you going?”
“Away from you!” Rosemary calls over her shoulder as she weaves through the parked cars, trying to remember where they left the Gay Mobile. Thunder grumbles in the distance.
“Wait, are you mad at me or something?” Logan shouts behind her.
Rosemary wheels around. “Of course I’m mad at you!”
Rainwater has already drenched Logan’s hair and it’s plastered against her confused face. “Why?”
“Because Joe was in the emergency room, and you went to the cafeteria for a milkshake!”
The milkshake in question has disappeared, thankfully, probably in a trash can on the way outside. “I was hungry! We didn’t have lunch!” Logan raises her voice over the pounding rain and thunder. They’ve finally arrived at the van.
Rosemary’s throat already feels hoarse when she screams again, “You reverted back to your asshole self when it really mattered. You’re allowed to admit you care, Logan!”
She can’t see Logan’s expression through the rain, can’t even be sure Logan heard her. This isn’t like Pacific Northwest rain, with its incessant light spitting. The desert is weeping huge, hot drops that soak her skin and blur her vision.
“What does that mean?” Logan asks, all pretenses of friendship gone from her tone.
“Joe could’ve died, and you acted like it didn’t matter!”
“You can’t die from farts!”
Rosemary takes a step closer to Logan so she can stare up into those eyes. And then the bastard reaches for her sunglasses. “Don’t you dare put those on! It’s raining right now! You don’t get to hide behind your sunglasses or your indifference!”
Rosemary doesn’t want to have this conversation with her own reflection in Logan’s sunglasses; she wants to say this to Logan’s face. “You know what? I’m glad I didn’t kiss you last night. Because youwould’ve pretended that didn’t matter, either. That’s what you do. You run away from anything real.”
Logan’s eyes narrow. “You… you were going to kiss me last night?”
Rosemary rubs rainwater out of her face and takes another step forward. “It must be exhausting, never letting yourself feel anything!”
Now Logan surges forward. “Just because I don’t catastrophize about everything doesn’t mean I don’t feel anything!”
“Bullshit.”
Logan barks out a single laugh like a bullet. “Ha!” Rain drips into her open mouth.
“You can’t even accept that Joe is dying. You refuse to let yourself feel the impending loss!”
“We’re going to lose him, Rosemary!” Logan screams. “Why would I want to feel that?”
“Because!” Rosemary throws her hands toward the sky. “Because some people are worth the hurt!”
“Like you?” Logan asks. The words crack like thunder. “Is that what this is really about? You’re just hurt that I didn’t kiss you last night?” she asks in her asshole voice. “Did you consider that maybe I just don’t feel that way about you?”
Rosemary grabs the front of Logan’s overalls. She wants to punch her in that arrogant, uncaring, milkshake mouth.
She kisses her instead.
Becausethatwill show her.
Rosemary kisses Logan Maletis in the rain outside an Albuquerque hospital, and dammit, she tastes like strawberries. Logan’s mouth is wet and soft, and Rosemary grips her overalls tighter, trying to keep them both upright.
Logan lets them fall, and they stumble backward until Rosemary collides with the back of the Gay Mobile.
