Page 59 of The Lost Lord
“Oh?”
“Father left you a letter. I haven’t read it, of course.”
“I would have, in your position.” Richard chuckled.
“No, Richard, I believe you have more honor than that,” Edward said quietly.
“You’re the only one,” Richard muttered. His mood turned sour in an instant.
Edward shifted in his seat to examine him. Richard squirmed and gazed out the window, pretending he was unaffected by his brother’s scrutiny.
“Miriam wouldn’t say so. Nor would her companion, Mrs. Kent,” Edward observed. “I know you dislike her, but you should know that Harper was the one who convinced me to ask you to return to England. And since you’ve been back, you have proven yourself to be a man of honor, time and again.”
Richards swallowed. His eyes felt hot and itchy, and a vise tightened around his temples. “Nonsense,” he scoffed. “I was a selfish, drunken prat.”
“You did burn down the family town house in a rage upon discovering that Father was not going to have me committed to an asylum, clearing the way for me to inherit the earldom.” Edward responded.
“I was drunk and angry. As I said, a prat.” Richard said.
“Drunk, angry, and entitled describes your entire personality prior to leaving England. Tell me about your time in America. Clearly it has had a salubrious effect upon you.” Edward observed. “You’re different, now.”
“So are you.” Richard parried. “You look happy. Prosperous.”
“I am content with my life. Mostly.”
A momentary thought lodged in Richard’s mind.It should have been my life.Richard flicked it away. Edward wasn’t living Richard’s life. He was the earl, yes. And yet he was a very different earl from the one Richard would have been. “Mostly? What’s missing?”
“I could do without the House of Lords business.” Edward grimaced.
Richard chuckled. “I doubt anyone relishes it.”
“I have noticed a certain distance between you and your bride. Is everything all right between you?”
“Not exactly. Do you know how I came to marry Miriam?” Richard asked, unable to meet Edwards curious, pitying gaze.
“Not the full story.”
“Her friend has tried to use me in a plot to secure Miriam’s fortune.” Richards said this lightly, as though it were of no import. “And I went along with it because… because I had gotten her friend with child.”
Heavy silence fell between them.
“You see Edward it was nothing but a scheme, but then I went and fell in love. I didn’t want to do it, yet I couldn’t abandon the child.”
“Is there a child?” Edward asked. He shifted away, as though processing what Richard had told him.
“I don’t know.” Richard admitted. Shame pumped through him and chilled his blood. He was sick of feeling this way.
“How much does Miriam know?”
“Everything. So, you see brother I am not a man of honor. I do not deserve your loyalty. At bottom I am still the same Richard who left you to mourn our father alone.”
The carriage stopped short. Richard didn’t wait for the footman. Instead, he flung himself out the door and onto the pavement striding into the home that he had once expected to be his.
At dinner, Edward attempted to engage him, but Richard’s curdled mood hadn’t lifted.
“I thought we could ride out to your cottage tomorrow. It isn’t far from Briarcliff.”
“Certainly, if you wish. If I am to receive a viscountcy, I ought to see my future country seat,” Richard replied with all the neutrality he could muster.
