Page 44 of Wild Card
“I don’t know how to be around you anymore.” Esmé finally speaks up. “You're lying to me, and you're lying to yourself. It’s never been that way with us.” She’s looking more hurt than she is angry.
“You're my best friend, Ez. Please don’t make this hard. Come on, we're gonna practically be sisters.” I stare at her in confusion when she suddenly pulls over and shuts off the engine.
“If you're my best friend, then tell me what my dad and my brother have on you. I know you, Ruby. You wouldn't be going along with this unless you had to. Your mom would be turning in her grave right now if she knew. All she ever wanted was for you to be happy.”
“Ez–”
“No!” she yells at me in frustration. “Don’t give me more lame-ass excuses. I want the truth. You're signing yourself up fora lifetime of misery. Did you know that my dad used to beat my mom, too? He beat her so bad that she left town, and she never looked back. She was too scared to even come back for her little girl.” Tears fill my best friend's eyes, and when I reach out my hand to take hers, she pulls it away. “That's what you’re gonna become if you continue with this bull shit.”
“I didn’t know that,” I tell her softly. I always assumed that Brett and Esmé’s mom was dead. It always felt like a touchy subject.
“You wouldn’t, because no one ever talks about her; she’s been forgotten because what happened to her doesn’t match up to Porter family standards.” She rests her head back against her seat and slams her hand against the wheel.
“That's what I don’t understand, Esmé. I don’t match up to that standard. I don’t come from money; everyone knew my mom was a whore before she came to town.” I’m really hoping she can give me some answers, even if I have none to offer her. “I don’t know why your dad and brother want this for me, but I?—”
“Are you serious?” Esmé laughs. “You don’t see it?”
“See what?” I shake my head, confused.
“Ruby, you're this town's little darling. Not a single person has a bad word to say about you. You're beautiful. You have the biggest heart and the kindest nature. Brett needs that when Dad steps down if he’s gonna be elected to take his place.”
“What are you talking about?” I laugh because there is no way Derek Porter would ever stand down from his position.
“Dad knows that times are changing; mayors in other towns are getting younger, and he won't win his election. He wants to keep his influences. If he stands down early, his competitors won’t be prepared. Brett is doing everything he can to set himself up to become his replacement. Dad will still run this town, but he’ll have a fresh face to hide behind. They need you to helpthem get the town on their side. Brett wants that wholesome family man image.”
“Shit.” I rest back in my own chair as I take in what she’s saying, and suddenly it all makes sense.
“How long have you known about this?” I question her, wondering why she never told me before.
“About a month. I heard them talking it over one night in Dad’s office, and until Brett hit you, I thought you were happy. Despite the plan, I was sure he loved you, and I didn’t want to hurt your feelings. You can’t do this to yourself, Ruby. I don’t have a choice, but you do.” She takes my hand and squeezes it like she’s desperate for me to see sense.
“I don’t have a choice either.” I wish I could tell her why, but I won’t put her in danger, too.
“Youcantell, you can tell me anything.” She sounds so frustrated.
“You haven’t told me what happened with you and Hack,” I point out, trying to lighten the mood and distract her.
“Nothing happened with me and Hack,” she sighs. “There, are you happy now? I’m sorry to disappoint you.”
“I’m not disappointed, and if nothing happened, why don't you put people straight when they say it did?” I laugh, unable to figure her out.
“Because I don’t want to be a pawn in my daddy’s game of power. None of his rich friends' sons is gonna wanna marry the girl who slept with the biker,” she tells me. “I can take the digs that Brett makes and the looks I get from my father, if it means I get to choose my own future. Now, tell me why you can’t choose yours.” The look she gives me tells me she’s not gonna let me get away with it.
“A few years ago, my Mom did something…She did it in self-defense, and she didn’t mean for it to go as far as it did…but.” Ishake my head, unsure if I can admit what it is. Esmé is better off not knowing.
“She didn’t know what to do, so she called your dad for help.”
“She called my dad? Why?” Esmé looks confused.
“Because the two of them were…they were seeing each other, quietly, of course; your dad wouldn’t have wanted to be associated with her. Which is why I’ve not been able to make any sense of the whole me and Brett thing…”
“Ruby, what was it your mom did?” Esmé asks, and I can see from the look that's in her eyes that she fears my answer.
“She killed a Royal Bastard; their president at the time…She killed Ash’s dad,” I admit, burying my hands in my head and sobbing, because despite what Esmé might think, there's no getting out of this for me.
TWENTY-ONE
Ash
