Page 11 of Something Like Daybreak
“She left this morning.” Victor grinned. “I’m so excited for her.”
Strange. Ben felt frightened for Jace. He glanced over his shoulder and locked eyes with him, only for a second, but it was enough to nearly make him lose it. He faced forward again, peering through the trees. “Isn’t this the clearing where you used to live?”
“It is,” Victor said. “And it isn’t.”
“You should try to be more enigmatic in your new life,” Ben teased.
Victor laughed. “What I mean to say, is there’s no special place for people to go when they want to reincarnate. Like so many things here, it’s a matter of expressing will. My mom left from our old house. She simply opened the front door and stepped outside. Of everything. For me and Jace, I whipped up something a little more memorable.”
They broke through the trees and reached the clearing, except there was no lean-to or smoldering fire. Instead he saw a massive hole in the ground, like an earthquake had swallowed up the land. All that remained of the clearing were jagged edges of rock surrounded by a ring of trees, and in the middle of it all, a gaping void.
“Come see,” Victor said, leading the way. “It’s perfectly safe. Unless you fall in.”
Ben cautiously crept toward the edge and peered over. Beneath the glimmering of silver stars, a blue and green sphere swirled with clouds. He stared, stunned by the Earth’s beauty. The afterlife was filled with incomprehensible wonders of staggering design, but somehow it all paled in comparison to a isolated planet that spun gracefully through the cosmos.
“Gorgeous, isn’t it?” Victor breathed. “I can’t wait to get back there.”
Ben felt drawn toward it too, almost wanting to lean forward over the edge. Then again, it was an awfully long way down.
“I’m sorry,” Ben said, tearing his attention away.
“For what?” Victor asked.
“I’m going to ask Jace to stay. One last time.”
Victor’s face was serene. “Good. I want him to be sure. I’ll even buy you some time.” He turned and shouted, “Hey, Tim! Come check this out.”
Ben sought out Jace, who was standing farther away. He rushed over to him, almost managing a smile when he heard Tim say, “Holy shit, dude! That’s amazing!” The others were soon forgotten as Ben grabbed Jace’s hand and led him back into the woods, just far enough that they’d have privacy.
“This isn’t goodbye,” Jace began to say.
“It will be,” Ben said, taking his other hand as they faced each other, “no matter what, because you’re going to come back as someone else. Think about what that will actually mean.” He had practiced what needed to happen next, searching his soul in the most literal sense to reconnect with the life he’d lived previously. Ben felt his outward appearance shift and change. He became a middle-aged Scottish woman who always thought of herself as frumpy and plain. She wore a simple dress woven from heavy cloth and was wrapped in a tartan cloak, her brown hair frizzy and untamed. “This is who I was,” she said with a heavy accent. “And it's a great mighty distance from who I became. Are you really claiming you could still love me like this?”
Jace didn’t seemed shocked in the slightest. Instead he leaned forward, touching his lips to hers in a kiss that was undeniable in its intent. And when he pulled back, he was a fifty-year-old man with salt-and-pepper hair and a thick mustache. “Ialways loved you, Abigail,” he said. “That hasn’t and never will change.”
Abigail felt the relief that came from a lifetime of yearning and covered her face so he wouldn’t see her cry. When she removed her hands, the fingers were thin and young. She had become Ben again. “God damn it, Edgar,” he swore. “You were supposed to reject me.”
“Did you really think I would?” Jace asked, reverting back to his usual self.
“No. But I still hoped.” Ben grabbed him and clung tight, burying his face in Jace’s chest as he began to weep. “I can’t do this again.”
“Maybe it’s who we are,” he heard Jace rumble. “I’m not sure if we ever got to spend an entire lifetime together. Not in the way we would have liked. But then, that only makes our love sweeter. A taste is enough to keep me going.”
Ben shook his head as he pulled back. “I’ll never get enough. Not of us.”
“That’s a relief. It would hurt more to think that you ever could.” Jace glanced toward the clearing with a longing in his eyes that was familiar. Ben normally only saw it when Jace looked at him. He wouldn’t be so selfish as to demand it stay that way. Just a little longer. That was all he asked. Ben gently touched Jace’s chin to regain his attention. He stared at a face that had always been a source of comfort and began to kiss it. Jace’s lips, his cheeks, his forehead…
“Promise me this isn’t the end,” Ben pleaded.
Jace’s smile was heartbreakingly reassuring. “Death couldn’t keep us apart, Ben. And neither will living. Our love is too strong.” He reached out, his hand stroking Ben’s hair as tears of his own began to flow. “I love you. And I know you wouldn’t be here now if you didn’t love me too. So thank you, Ben. For everything.”
Words were no longer enough. They held each other and cried. There was no rush. Nobody interrupted them. They held each other until they had calmed down again, although the ache didn’t go away. Not for Ben.
“It’s time,” Jace said, gently leading him toward the clearing. He kept walking, still holding Ben’s hand as they approached Tim. “Take care of each other,” Jace said, finally letting go.
Ben turned and felt Tim’s arms wrap around him from behind. He watched as Jace and Victor walked together toward the edge. He couldn’t hear the words they murmured to each other, but the joy on their faces was unmistakable. Jace took Victor’s hand in his and, after a single devastating glance back, leapt into the hole. Ben broke free from Tim’s grasp and ran, needing to see what became of them. When he reached the edge, skidding to a halt on his knees, he saw two beings of light fluttering through the stars like a pair of celestial butterflies, growing more distant by the second until all that remained was a twinkle which soon disappeared.
Ben rolled over onto his side, curled up, and sobbed. He felt two strong hands slide beneath him and lift. Tim hoisted him up, cradling Ben in his arms as he turned away from the edge.
