Page 21 of Crocodile Tears
I shake my head in mock sympathy.“Most of my dates won’t even try anything spicier than black pepper.”
“Their loss.”She shrugs with the casual confidence of someone who’s never met a scientific topic she couldn’t master.“The endorphin response to capsaicin is one of the most efficient natural mood elevators available.”
I raise an eyebrow at the clinical way she delivers this information.“You sound like you’ve researched this scientifically.”
She shrugs again, this time with the casual air of someone who’s never met a topic she didn’t want to study.“I research everything scientifically.It’s a compulsion.”
For the first time in months, I’m not automatically cataloging escape routes or threat assessments.I’m just enjoying the company of a brilliant woman who finds my background interesting rather than disturbing.
That’s when my enhanced senses pick up something wrong.
The sound is subtle—a car engine idling longer than normal, and the particular quality of radio static that suggests surveillance equipment.My peripheral vision catches movement on the street that’s too deliberate for random pedestrians.
Every instinct I’ve developed over fifteen years of staying alive in dangerous situations starts screaming warnings.Someone is watching us, and they’re being professional about it.
I need to adjust our route without alarming Rebecca, which means maintaining normal conversation while implementing basic countersurveillance techniques.Simple enough, except my brain is now split between social interaction and tactical assessment.
“So,” Rebecca continues, apparently unaware of the sudden tension in my posture, “what specific applications do you think my research might have for enhancing recovery times in high-stress occupations like yours?”
The question requires thoughtful analysis of genetic therapy applications, but my attention is focused on the black SUV that’s been following us for the past two blocks.Professional surveillance, definitely.
“Well…” I casually steer us toward a more populated street.“The migratory patterns of Canadian geese actually demonstrate fascinating parallels to cellular regeneration cycles.”
Her stride falters slightly.“I’m sorry, what?”
The complete disconnect between her question and my answer hangs in the air like evidence of a mental breakdown.My brain, still trying to process surveillance protocols while maintaining romantic conversation, doubles down on the insanity.
“Canadian geese.”I nod enthusiastically while tracking the SUV’s repositioning in my peripheral vision.“Their navigation abilities during long-distance migration show remarkable similarity to the way cells coordinate repair processes in reptilian healing responses.”
Rebecca stops walking entirely and stares at me.“Calvin, are you feeling all right?Because geese navigation and cellular repair are completely unrelated biological processes.”
“Right, yes, of course they are.”I gesture vaguely, trying to look like someone making normal conversation rather than someone whose attention is split between his date and potential threats.“I saw this very interesting documentary recently about avian genetics, and it got me thinking about evolutionary adaptations for enhanced performance under environmental stress.”
She crosses her arms and gives me the kind of look usually reserved for particularly slow graduate students.“What documentary?”
“It was… uh… National Geographic.Or maybe Discovery Channel.”I’m making this up as I go along, which becomes increasingly obvious with each word.“The point is, when you consider the metabolic requirements for sustained flight over thousands of miles, there are fascinating parallels to the energy demands of accelerated tissue regeneration.”
Her expression suggests she’s trying to decide whether I’ve had some kind of neurological episode.“Birds and reptile healing are different kingdoms of biological function.”Her voice carries the exasperated tone of someone explaining basic facts to a particularly dense student.“There’s no scientific basis for comparing goose migration to genetic therapy applications.”
I gesture more wildly, desperately trying to maintain the charade.“But the underlying genetic expression patterns—”
“There are no underlying genetic expression patterns.”Rebecca throws her hands up in exasperation.“You’re talking about flight navigation versus cellular repair mechanisms.They have nothing in common.”
The SUV accelerates past us and then makes a U-turn at the next intersection.Professional surveillance teams rotate positions to avoid detection, but this is getting sloppy.
“You’re absolutely right.”I run a hand through my hair, probably looking completely unhinged.“I guess I was thinking about the documentary’s section on how genetic factors influence adaptation to environmental challenges, and somehow, my brain made a connection to your research on enhanced healing capabilities.”
She still looks confused.“What genetic factors?You’re making this up as you go along.Aren’t you?”
“Maybe a little.”
“A little?”
“Okay, entirely.”I wince at my own admission.“But there was definitely a documentary about geese.”
The SUV completes its turn and begins approaching our position again.This is no longer subtle observation but active surveillance with preparation for potential contact.
Without thinking, I grab Rebecca’s hand and pull her against the brick wall of the nearest building, pressing my mouth to hers in what probably looks like spontaneous romantic passion but is actually a tactical maneuver to conceal our faces from visual identification.
