Page 33 of Redemption
She was always meant to have better—to be better. But sometimes your choices, and those of others, become so intertwined that it’s impossible to know where the guilt of those choices should lay.
“It’s been a long time since I talked to God, MJ. I’m not sure he’d want to hear from me much anymore.”
“Yeah,” she says, sighing and looking out the window. “Maybe you’re right. Sometimes, I think he’s punishing me.”
Her lower lip trembles before she sucks it between her teeth, and it sends a dagger straight into my heart. I don’t say anything the rest of the drive because I can’t disagree with her. Life without her has always been a punishment.
Chapter 11
Mallorie Jade
Ihaven’t seen Hayes in three weeks—not since he dropped me off at my front door without so much as a goodbye after we visited Langston’s grave.
There was hurt in his eyes when he found out I had been back to visit Langston without telling him, but in all fairness—not even my parents knew about that. Throughout the years I’ve been gone, I would drive back on the days when it felt like my heart would actually break from my sadness. Sitting at Langston’s grave, I would talk to him like he was still here and wait for his answers like he could still give them—but mostly, I would apologize for all the things I hid from him that contributed to his death. It’s a weight I carry on my shoulders every day.
My reluctance to see my brother had nothing to do with going to see him and everything to do with standing there in front of him with Hayes by my side. It was different than facing Langston on my own. With Hayes, that weight became crushing because we had to face the truths we hid for so long.
But even though Hayes and I can never be the same people we were before Langston died, I do feel bad that I hurt him. It’s the cycle we keep following, but I don’t want to anymore. I’m tired of hurting him, even if I am still angry at him. So it’s bestto avoid each other, at least as much as possible, in a small town with only one grocery store.
I’ve managed it for three weeks, but as I walk into the board meeting, my luck runs out because there he is, sitting beside Lily, looking so dashing it hurts.
Hayes and Lily notice me at the same time. He blinks, slowly taking me in and ignoring Lily as she slips her hand into the crook of his elbow. Smug satisfaction grips my chest. He’s looking at me while sitting next to her.
It’s wrong of me to feel that way, and truthfully, if it were any other guy, I would feel sorry for Lily. But the way she spoke like she already had me pegged during the interview causes any amount of sympathy I might have had for her to melt away.
Her eyes are on me, too, as I draw closer, and there’s hate there that goes so deep it causes me to grit my teeth. She called me earlier this week to let me know the board meeting was tonight. From how she made it sound, my attendance was mandatory, but now that I’m here, I wonder if it was so that she could stake her claim on Hayes.
Not that I have any claim on him, but apparently, she thinks I’m the competition if this territorial show is any indication. She may not be dating him yet, but she obviously wants to be.
“Lily. Hayes,” I say as a way of greeting.
There’s only one seat left in the small meeting room, and unfortunately, it’s beside Hayes. As I slip into the chair, I’m careful to scoot it as far away from him as possible, but in the end, it’s only a matter of inches that separate our arms, both lying on top of the armrests.
Once I’m settled, Hayes leans in, the movement dislodging Lily’s hand from his arm. She crosses her arms with a huff, and I have to fight the urge to smirk—until I get a whiff of Hayes’s cologne as he leans closer. Then I have to hold my breath. Thatsmell—leather and spice—makes it hard to think past the man sitting beside me.
“What are you doing here?” He asks.
“I could ask you the same thing.”
His gaze is calculating as he lets his eyes roam over my face, studying me as if he can see past all my defenses to the darkest part of me—as if we are the only two people in this room. My breath hitches under the power of that stare, making me want to spill all my hurts into his hands to hold. His upper lip curls up, revealing a row of straight white teeth. He pulls a breath in to say something when a gavel hits the table, calling the meeting to attention.
Heat burns my face as embarrassment floods in. The room is silent, and several faces peer back at us.
How long had we sat there staring at each other while others looked on?
The clock on the wall shows that seconds have passed, but in my mind, it felt like minutes—long enough to feed the gossip for days after we leave here.
I don’t look at Hayes again as I sit back in my chair and place more distance between us. Beside Hayes, Lily’s face is red, and the glare she gives me when Hayes isn’t watching makes me nervous for my job—though, based on what happens next, Lily is not my only concern.
A man’s voice from the head of the table rumbles, calling the meeting to order.
“We have several things on the agenda tonight, so I propose we start the meeting. All in favor, say aye.”
A chorus of ayes follows. The meeting begins, and I lean forward in my chair, still wondering why I’m here. From my understanding, potential employees do not usually attend the board meetings. So why, then, am I here?
It doesn’t take long for my question to be answered.
The man who called the meeting speaks again as the discussion of next school year’s finances is summed up.
