Page 63 of Redemption
Swallowing hard, I bring my attention back to Tanner. “Yup, that was him.”
“Man, that guy was a legend. I can only hope to be half the player he was—maybe then I could get something right.”
Hayes flicks his gaze to me.
Good, he caught that too.
Hayes turns his attention back to the helmet in his hand, trying to act casual. But I can see the tension in his shoulders—things just got a lot more serious.
There has to be a careful balance here. If it looks like Hayes cares too much—like he’s trying to push this kid further than he’s willing to give—Tanner will spook and shut down. It’s what Langston did whenever we tried to talk to him.
“What do you mean get something right, Tanner?” Hayes asks, keeping his gaze on the helmet.
“Nothing—just forget it,” Tanner says, scrubbing at the helmet a little harder than he was before.
At this point, Hayes sets his helmet aside and leans forward to rest his elbows against his knees.
“You remember what I said about trust, right?”
Tanner grinds his teeth. “Yeah—only adults are good at saying that, and then you screw up a couple of times, and they never look at you the same.”
It’s like he cracked my life open and summed it up in one go. I’ve been a disappointment most of my life, and I always needed someone there to tell me I wasn’t—only I never got that. But I can be that for Tanner.
“Tanner,” I start, “sometimes adults make mistakes that have nothing to do with the person you are. I know that’s hard to see right now, but I promise one day you will. In the meantime, it doesn’t make you a screw-up. You just have to be the bestversion of yourself for yourself—not the person you think other people need.”
“Easier said than done,” he mumbles, and from the way his face shuts down, I won’t push this conversation any further. He needs time to process—and proof that not all adults are going to let him down.
It makes me wonder what he’s experiencing at home because no one would have guessed the pressures that were being put on Langston’s shoulders by our parents.
Is that happening here, too, or is it something else?
Chapter 20
Hayes
We work in silence for the rest of practice, but I catch MJ staring at Tanner several times when he isn’t looking.
The worry on her face is heartbreaking. It makes me want to wrap her up in my arms and protect her from the horrors of this world, but she’d probably slap me if I did that—and I would let her, especially after I lied to her about my tattoo. The day I got it, I was missing her so bad it felt like I was missing a physical limb. I needed something to remind me that she was real—that our time together was real. So I went out and found the first tattoo shop I could and inked her into my skin.
“Tanner,” I say, putting the last helmet back on the rack, “You did good work today. I’m proud of you.”
His shoulders straighten as the words sink into him, and I wonder how many times he’s ever heard them in his life—not enough if that one time has such an impact.
“Am I free to go?” he asks, his voice less rough than it was this morning.
“Yup. I’ll walk you out.” Looking at MJ, I ask, “Do you have all your stuff?”
She holds up her phone and coffee cup from this morning and nods, a smile playing on the edges of her mouth. Pulling my keys out of my pocket, I push open the door for MJ and Tannerto walk ahead of me out of the locker room, and once they are out, I turn back to lock the door.
“Same time again next week, Tanner.”
“We’ll see about that,” a man’s voice says from behind me.
I wait until I’m done pulling the keys from the door before I turn around to face him.
Eric stands leaning against the fence that surrounds the field with a woman by his side. His smirk is smug as he looks at me, but I pay him no mind. It’s Tanner who has caught my attention. Gone is the boy from a few minutes ago, walking out of here with his shoulders held high. In his place is a teenager who is so unsure of himself that he looks like he could melt into the pavement below our feet. I narrow my eyes, looking between him and Eric.
“What are you doing here, Eric?”
