Page 67 of Laird of Steel
The question was so fearful, Merraid couldn’t help but feel sorry for the lady. After all, she was just as much a victim of the king’s manipulations as Gellir. Lady Carenza probably knew nothing about Gellir aside from his reputation as a fierce warrior.
Merraid had promised Lady Feiyan she’d help ensure a successful marriage. She’d promised Gellir she’d find a woman who could love him. She meant to keep those promises. Even if it shattered her heart.
“His enemies call him Grim Gellir for his ferocity in battle,” she said. “But he’s very kind and patient with those he cares for.”
“Then I must hope he cares for me.”
“He agreed to marry ye, m’lady.”
“Men do much for position and power. But I would know his heart.”
Merraid was confused. “M’lady,” she ventured, “did ye not agree to marry him as well, without knowin’ him?”
Her chuckle was soft and sad. “What else could I do but as my father commanded me?”
“Ye didn’t wish to marry Sir Gellir?” Merraid asked gently.
The lady lowered her head and bit her lip. Merraid could see she was holding back tears. But instead of weeping, she forced a smile to her lips. “O’ course I wished to marry. ’Tis every lady’s dream, aye?” Her voice held a false brightness. “To wed a handsome knight. To live in a magnificent keep. To have a home full o’ childr-” She broke off and buried her face in the wash cloth.
Pity welled up in Merraid’s breast. Enough to make her set aside her own heart’s pain. “There now, m’lady. Don’t weep. All will be well. No one will be as devoted to ye as Sir Gellir.”
For some reason, her words of reassurance made Lady Carenza break into sobs.
Merraid wrung her hands, unsure what to do.
When the lady finally regained her composure, she gazed up at Merraid with an apologetic smile. Her eyes were wet with tears and so blue, they were nearly violet. Naturally, Carenza was even beautiful when she wept.
“Forgive me,” she said. “I’m bein’ selfish and spoiled. I’m sure ’tis only nerves.”
When Merraid’s nerves were in need of calming, she did hertaijiquan.But she wasn’t going to suggest that to the lady.
“I could fetch ye a cup o’ wine or strong ale,” she offered.
“Nay, I must have my wits about me to meet my new…” She bit her trembling lip. “My new husband.”
Merraid wondered now if that was such a good idea. Gellir could look formidable and grim when he chose to. He might react badly to a lass who burst into tears at the mere sight of him.
“Perhaps ye don’t have to meet him tonight,” she suggested. “I could say ye’re weary from travelin’. That ye’d prefer to wait till morn.”
Carenza chewed on her lip, tempted for a moment. Then she shook her head. “Nay, delay will only make matters worse. I mustn’t be a coward. I must face my fate with courage and calm.”
She rose from the bath. Her face was stoic now, like that of Athena, the goddess of strength and wisdom. Merraid wrapped a length of linen around her straightened shoulders.
She sighed as she stepped from the tub. Then she murmured wistfully, “Och, Merraid, so much of a woman’s destiny lies in the hands o’ men.”
Merraid couldn’t agree less. Lady Feiyan had taught her to be the mistress of her own destiny. In fact, with the messy exception of letting her emotions get the better of her where Gellir was concerned, Merraid’s choices were her own.
“May I speak honestly, m’lady?” she asked.
“Please.”
“Were ye betrothed against your will?”
She hesitated. “Nay, not really. ’Tis only…” She broke off, then searched Merraid’s eyes with penetrating force. “Can I trust ye?”
“Aye.”
“Ye must not breathe a word o’ this to anyone.”
