Page 47 of Hearts on the Table
“Ah, no. That would be Sister Mary Louise. Those catholic school nuns can put the fear of God into you.”
I grunted, addingdo not think of Lainey in a catholic school uniformto my list of things to avoid tonight. “I’m sure Will would give you the code to use every once in a while, if you asked. You’re his favorite regular, after all.”
Silence met my offer, and I could practically feel her walls coming back up, brick by brick. Dammit.
I rolled to a seat, peeking over to where she twisted on her back, staring blankly up at the ceiling. “Is this the part where you avoid me again?” I asked, teasing, but not.
“I…No. It’s…” Her head rolled towards me on the mat. “It’s stupid.”
“I’d rather talk about something stupid now than not talk to you for another week.”
“Oh, God.” She shriveled up, a full-body grimace. Her hair hung in her eyes when she rolled up to face me. “I’m sorry. Katie freaked me out, and then, I don’t know. Everything with Jas felt too real.”
“Jas?” Throughout the past few days of wracking my brain, trying to figure out what I’d done wrong, my sister-in-law hadn’t been on the list. They’d been thick as thieves after their time together. Jasmine was pestering me daily about when I was going to tie Lainey down.
Whenever the hell she’d let me, was the answer, but it was hard to snap at a woman recently released from the hospital. Jas’s spirits were high, and she could work from home, but she’d needed something to take her mind off her diagnosis. She could fixate on me and Lainey, if that’s what she needed.
“The only thing I’m good at is work, Sam. I’ve never been good at relationships.”
“Sweetheart.” I couldn’t stop the endearment from rushing out. If I hadn’t been sitting, those liquid brown eyes would have knocked me on my ass. She was so pretty and vibrant. Seeing her huddled on the mat, looking like she was confessing her deepest sin, tore at something inside me.
“No, really. I’m just notgoodat this. You don’t get it because you are. You have all your family and your people. I don’t have that.” She bit her lip. “I grew up really sheltered, traveling around with my mom a lot or hanging out with my nannies. I didn’t learn how todo this. I thought maybe I could, you know? I asked Rija out for tapas and then Jas needed someone in the exam room and Conner starts talking to me about tacos and Katie is standingright theremaking me remember how I’ve never had a successful relationship with anyone, ever.”
Her hand shot out to wrap around my wrist. Those delicate fingers hardly closed around it. “This hasnothingto do with you, Sam. I just got…overwhelmed, I guess. Maybe I tried to do too much too fast. I’m sorry.”
Her skin looked good against mine. A few shades darker. Smoother. “Maybe you talk to me about it next time, instead of avoiding me in the hallways.”
“I didn’tavoidyou.” Her thumb brushed across my wrist.
“I’m pretty sure I saw you smack into the doorway of the physician’s lounge you were trying to get away so quickly.”
She smiled. It wasn’t much, but after these days without her, it felt like the sun coming out after a storm. She grabbed my hand when I flexed it out to her. “You want to talk about it? The overwhelm?”
“No, thanks.”
“So, I’ll talk to you next week, I guess?”
Another smile, this one tinged with bitterness. “I really am sorry if I hurt you. It doesn’t seem fair. You didn’t sign up for all my baggage.”
“I know exactly what I signed up for.” I cupped her face when she looked away. “You’re going to have to try harder than that if you want to scare me off. How am I supposed to get the full trial-dating experience if you don’t give me the chance?”
As we moved through our sets, she cracked open, inch by inch. By the time we’d finished abs, she felt like Lainey again. No more avoiding my eyes or going weirdly, coldly silent.
Aside from a quick jog, I kept our exercises light. I wasn’t trying to run us further into the ground. Her ongoing commentary on our reps kept me smiling. After our date last week, all I’d wanted was more of her. When she started avoiding me, I’d worried I wouldn’t get a chance; not to hear her laugh, or feel her lips on mine again.
But as we moved our way around the gym, it started to feel like another shot with Lainey was a distinct possibility. As much as I was eying her, I could also feel her eyes on me. It was addicting. Especially when she dialed up the charm.
“Close out with squats?” She tapped a kettlebell with her toe. “Your favorite.”
“Favorite?”
She met my gaze in the mirror, splaying her fingers across her ribs as she effected a low growl I assumed was supposed to sound like me. “Perfect.” Her shoulders shuddered, eyes rolling back in her head.
My face warmed. She’d never brought up my little assist that day, and I told myself she hadn’t noticed. It wasn’t a big deal. I was equally pleased and mortified that she seemed to remember it just as well as I did. “Sorry about that. Couldn’t help myself.”
“Never apologize for feeding my praise kink.”Oh, fuck.I was filing that one away for later. I could work with a praise kink, I really, really could. “Come on doc, my form needs correcting.”
I wanted to go to her. Hell, I just plain wantedher,but I still had a few shreds of dignity left. Even though my dick was trying its hardest to convince me that dignity was for assholes and I should go shove my tongue down her throat.
