Page 69 of Spotted at Lighthouse Bay
“Yay!” Mia let out a sigh. “Please assure Rick this guy I’m working with is legitimate. Uh, even if some of his techniques aren’t.”
“Sure,” Addy said, picking up her plate and mug. “He won’t mind anyway.”
Twenty-five
Getting in the car had been a mistake, but Rick didn’t have any other option. He couldn’t let Addy see what was about to happen.
By the time he got out of the house, he was gasping for air. He pulled open the driver’s door as his heart pounded against his ribs, pain shooting across his arms and chest in twisted vines. He could feel his pulse at the end of every nerve.
Rick shut the door, heat and nausea retching inside his gut. He put a numb hand to his stomach as his body shook and rattled.
The world was soundless and muffled, like he was being pulled under water. The walls of the car were closing in like a casket.
He was going to die this time. He was sure of it. His heart would finally give out and they’d find him cold and lifeless, slumped against the steering wheel.
The fact that Addy hadn’t come after him was a godsend. The fear of her seeing him only prolonged the panic, but in the privacy of the car, the most intense symptoms stopped after fifteen minutes.
Once his body had stopped shaking, Rick managed to pull out of the driveway and park behind the tea shop. Thankfully, no one seemed to be looking for him.
He put an unsteady hand into the glove compartment and fished out a candy bar. It was there for emergencies only. He’d hoped it wouldn’t be his own, but alas. Maybe he knew he’d be the one needing it when he’d bought it.
He hadn’t died this time, but it was the final nail in his coffin. He had to go. Rick couldn’t protect Addy. He couldn’t protect anyone.
What if this had happened when someone was coming after her? He was pathetic. He was beyond help.
Addy deserved better. Once this passed, he’d tell her that. He’d find a way to get her another bodyguard. Even Phil was better than he was. Phil didn’t fall to pieces because of a phone call.
It had been wrong of Rick to contact Addy’s ex-husband; he knew that now. Deep down, he’d known it when he did it. He was so focused on not letting IronClad Elite shirk their responsibility that he couldn’t stop himself. It was that moment the panic had started.
After another half hour, he was safe to drive. IronClad Elite had an office in Seattle. The fastest way to get to them would be by seaplane. He’d show up at the office, unannounced, and wouldn’t leave until this was resolved. He wasn’t much use to Addy, but if it was the last thing he did, he would get her more protection.
He put the car in drive. It was time to move.
The seaplane soared over the islands. He didn’t need to see the view. Addy had already showed him.
Rick leaned back and closed his eyes. The adrenaline dump from the panic attacks always wore him out. He probably wouldn’t have been safe to drive, and flying meant he could get to Addy more quickly.
He had to talk to her. As embarrassing as it was, he owed it to her to tell her what was going on. She needed to know the truth – the entire truth of how he’d failed.
She would probably try to minimize it, but Rick knew he wasn’t good for anybody. He’d find a way to face her. Once he had a solution, it’d be easier.
They landed on Lake Union. The city was dull and gray, rain spitting now and then, flicking into his eyes. He texted his buddy and got the name of the top guy, then caught a ride to IronClad Elite.
After flashing his badge at the front desk, they let him through, no questions. He was too tired to answer questions.
The office was on the fourth floor. Right out of the elevator stood a shining desk in gunmetal gray. The floors and walls were coated in white marble. A woman with coifed hair and red lipstick smiled when she saw him.
“How can I help you?”
He held up his badge again. “I’m here to talk to Cliff.”
She smiled, tapping something in her ear. “I’ll see if he’s available.”
That was easy. Being authoritative worked. It was all fake, though. Everything he did was fake. Faking he was okay. Faking he knew what he was doing.
It’d be over soon. He could withdraw to a cabin somewhere. Have his panic attacks amongst the birds.
“He’s coming now,” the woman said with a smile.
