Page 36 of Secret Bratva Baby
The Rose sitting at the table with my brothers this evening—that’s the Rose I’ve been longing for. Her radiant smile and cheeky jokes. Her beautiful, sweet nature and the way her eyes light up when she’s interested in what you’re talking about.
She’s gorgeous. Inside and out.
And losing her was the stupidest thing I ever managed to do in my life.
In the dining room, I fold up the empty pizza boxes, putting the leftovers into one box. I clear away the plates, working slowly to clear my mind with this simple task.
Then I head up to bed, drained again, wondering if I’ll be able to sleep tonight.
Chapter 10 - Rose
The mansion is beautiful.
It’s massive, and there is plenty of space for Lily to run around and enjoy herself. Besides that, it’s the safest possible place for us to be right now. With the amount of guards patrolling the property on a daily basis, I can sleep restfully at night, knowing that if someone tried to break in, there would be a solid wall of security for them to have to get through.
Of course, there are other things that keep me up at night. Unfortunately, I can’t leave because of those things. I’ve got to deal with them—my past and my emotional ties are not a good reason to leave and put my daughter at risk.
Regardless of how difficult it is for me to process being around Luka every day.
On the grass outside, sitting near the pool, I’m watching Lily attempt to catch a butterfly. She’s squatting on her haunches, watching it like a hawk, wiggling closer every now and then while trying not to disturb it, but inevitably it will flutter away from her and land somewhere else; then the whole activity starts again.
I stretch my legs out, wiggling my bare feet in the soft green lawn. Spring is one of my favorite times of the year. It’s warm, but not uncomfortable. The sun shines most days, but you still get the occasional fresh rainfall to wash things away.
I love the rain as much as I love the sun.
I’m not one of those people who need to choose between them.
Lily giggles, falling forward and landing on her hands and knees in the flower bed, getting dirt all over her pretty yellow dress.
She brushes her hands over the fabric, smearing the dirt in deeper. She looks proud of herself. I don’t know how she managed it, but there is a thick streak of soil across her cheek, too. I laugh.
“Did you catch it?” I call out to her.
“I almost did,” she nods, turning around to look for where it might have landed.
I pull the skirt of my dress up a little higher, enjoying the sun on my legs. I can’t remember the last time I just sat outside in a garden and enjoyed a moment with my daughter like this.
Before Luka took me, I was working myself to the bone. I never had time for her. I was missing all the best moments with her.
I didn’t even realize what that meant until I was forced away from the situation and into this one. This one has its own tension, but I’m loving every moment I get to spend with my little Lily flower.
At least something positive is coming out of this craziness.
I sense movement behind me and turn to see Luka standing on the patio. He’s looking directly at me, a slight smile on his face as his eyes trace over my stretched-out legs. His gaze sends a shiver of desire pulsing through me. I don’t pull my skirt back down. I want him to look at me like that, even though I shouldn’t.
My lips curve into a smile as well. But I can’t hold his stare, and I end up turning away from him to look at Lily again. My heart is racing.
Things have been so tense between Luka and me over the past few days.
It’s made more complicated by the fact that I’m so freaking attracted to him. I can’t keep my eyes off him when he’s around, but I’m also struggling with what he told me about himself and his family.
What’s best for my daughter?
That’s what I’m trying to figure out. At the end of the day, it’s the only thing that matters to me.
For now,what’s best for her is to stay here where it’s safe.
And for now, that’s all I’ve managed to decide.
