Page 385 of Releasing 10
JANUARY 25, 2004
TODAY MARKEDLIZ’S FORTIETH DAY IN TREATMENT.
It was the longest time we hadn’t seen each or spoke to each other in a decade, and every day, I continued to pine for what my soul assured me was its mate.
Unlike Pierce, who moved on within days of Liz’s departure, I still found myself thinking up excusesnotto.
I wasn’t unattracted to the girls who asked me out. I was just uninterested.
It had been more than three months since our breakup, and I still wasn’t over her, while the thought of being with another girl made my skin crawl.
I knew my behavior wasn’t normal for a lad my age, and Feely reminded me of that often, but I justcouldn’t.
Maybe I was programmed differently to the lads on my team, or maybe I was a prude like Liz had labeled me during one of her rampages when I wouldn’t have sex.
Nah, you’re definitely not a prude, lad.
It wasn’t like I didn’t want sex—ofcourseI did. I just didn’t want it with anyone other than the very girl I couldn’t have it with…
“Hello again.”
I was so deep in my thoughts that I almost ignored the soft-voiced girl who seemed to be addressing me.
Shaking my head to clear my thoughts, I retrained my attention from the locker I’d been staring aimlessly into to the familiar redhead smiling up at me.
“Uh, hey.” I turned to give her my attention. “Katie, right?”
“That’s right.” She smiled. “How’s it going?”
“Uh, grand.” I shrugged, knowing that I should give her more but not having it inside. “How’s it going for you?”
“It’s going,” she laughed, still smiling up at me. “So, listen, I wanted to apologize again for the whole maiming you on New Year’s Eve, while simultaneously thanking you for being so gracious about it.” Her cheeks flamed as she spoke. “I was in a really bad place that night, and I’d been… Uh, it doesn’t even matter.” She shook her head and offered me another bright smile. “Just thank you.” She winced before adding, “And sorry.”
“You don’t need to apologize,” I replied, finding her rambling endearing. “And you need to thank me even less.”
“Really?”
“Yeah, who doesn’t want to be kissed by a pretty girl on New Year’s?”
Her breath hitched. “You think I’m a pretty girl?”
Feeling slightly cornered, I nodded slowly. “You know you’re gorgeous.”
Her cheeks turned the color of her curls. “Wow.”
Feeling uncomfortable, I cleared my throat and turned my attention back to closing and locking the door of my locker.
“Hey, would you be,” Katie started to say, only to stumble over her words. “I mean, do you want to maybe go to, uh, or, ah, go to the…or just…uh, never mind.”
I watched from the corner of my eye as she face-palmed herself, all the while muttering, “Stop talking, Katie,” to herself as she trudged away. “You’re only making it a million times more awkward.”
Smothering a laugh, I shouldered my bag and followed her. “You know, you should really cut yourself some slack.”
“I should?”
“Absolutely,” I confirmed, falling into step beside her. “That took balls.”
“Assertiveness,” she explained, tightening her grasp on the straps of her bag. “It’s on the top of my list of New Year’s resolutions.”
