Page 9 of Alien Abduction for Professionals
The guys led me to a row of clothes stalls. I gaped at the garments. Of course, I should have known that I wouldn't find any Earth clothes here, but it was still a shock to see how different everything was. A shirt to my left had four armholes and it shimmered in all colours of the rainbows even though I could swear that it was white. Something that looked like a hoodie for a two-headed species had an inbuilt screen, showing text in an alien language on its front. Advertising, a political message, quotes from a song? I couldn't read it.
Xil flagged down a little AI globe - I'd seen other aliens use them - and asked it to lead us to a shop catering to humans. The ball whizzed away and we hurried to follow it through the narrowing walkways until we got to a rather sorry looking area. Barely any shoppers, dusty stalls, depressed sellers. Not exactly what I'd hoped for.
"Maybe we should go back," Havel suggested. "This looks seedy."
"Stall 429Y has the best clothes for humanoids," the AI chirped, sounding almost offended. "Please take a look."
It stopped above a lacklustre shop that had clearly seen better days. While other stalls used flashing lights, signs, garish colours and sexy shop assistants to lure in the crowds, this one had nothing but a tired looking alien with one large eye and no nose. The rest of him looked somewhat human in the sense that he only had two arms and two legs, without tentacles, tails or talons. After seeing dozens of different alien species today, I’d gained a new perspective on what was possible.
Xil pointed at a dark green blouse. "This would suit you. Plus, it matches the tribitt."
"And me," Matar grinned. "I love seeing you in my colour."
"You should also get something in yellow and blue then," Havel insisted immediately. "No favouritism."
"We don't stock yellow," the shop owner said in a monotonous, tired voice. "But we do have various blue shades. How about this skirt?"
He rummaged in a stack of barely folded clothing and pulled out a monstrosity of a skirt. It looked like a dishevelled chicken and a blueberry had a baby. And then added lots of frills. It was so ugly that it could probably count as fashion somewhere in the galaxy.
"No, thanks," I muttered. "Do you have any jeans?"
"Jeans?" he asked, clearly not recognising the word. Maybe my translator didn't know that.
I sighed. "Trousers, thick cloth, hard to destroy. Usually blue. Do you have anything like that?"
"Wouldn't you prefer something more flattering?" the alien insisted and held up a see-through blouse that would have barely covered my boobs.
"It would suit you," Havel whispered from behind me. I elbowed him in the stomach, and he groaned. "Alright, go with something else instead. But it would still look great on you."
I sighed. "Is there somewhere I could try on some of these?"
The cyclops nodded towards his right. "There's a changing pod over there."
I handed the tribitt to Matar and randomly grabbed a couple of items, not convinced I'd like any of them. Still, I didn't want to disappoint the guys by being too choosy. After all, we'd walked for ages to get to this stall and I didn't want to stay in this seedy area any longer than I had to.
The changing pod looked a bit like a port-a-loo, just more space-y. A silver door slid open when I approached, revealing a small room with mirrored walls. As soon as I stepped inside, the door closed. A light above me flickered into life, but even so, I felt a little claustrophobic without a window. Yup, just like a port-a-loo.
I quickly undressed and tried on the first shirt. It wasn't too bad, although it wasn't flattering in the slightest. I'd take it anyway, just to have something to show for. This shopping trip wouldn't be for nothing. The two pairs of trousers both didn't fit, although I might be able to wear the looser ones with a belt. I should check the stall if they had any. The puke-coloured jumper I'd grabbed was surprisingly comfortable. It looked horrendous, but it was warm and soft. The Jade was usually warm enough to walk around in t-shirts, but who knew when we might visit a colder planet. Better to be prepared.
The final item was a tank top that I wouldn't have chosen if I'd had given it a proper look. It ended above my navel and together with its extremely low cleavage, it didn't leave much to the imagination. The fabric's feel reminded me of neoprene except that it was thinner. My nipples poked through the fabric. Definitely not something I'd wear in public, and if the guys saw me wearing it, I wouldn't keep it on for long. They'd rip it off my body before ravishing me where I stood. Yes, I was speaking from experience.
Suddenly, the pod shook, and I stumbled back against the wall. The cabin swayed, leaning to one side as if someone was trying to push it over from outside.
"Hey, I'm in here!" I shouted as loud as I could. "Stop that!"
Nobody replied, but the movement continued. I dropped to my knees, feeling safer close to the floor. A lurch made me gasp. The pod was being pulled into the air. Fuck. What the bloody hell was happening here?
"Stop!" I cried. "Help!"
It was useless. The pod swayed as if it was swinging in the air. Were they transporting it somewhere else? This couldn't be happening. How did a shopping trip turn into this? All I could hope for was that this was an honest mistake and not an abduction. I doubted I'd ever come across abductors as friendly and cute as mine again.
Fuck. I continued shouting, but nobody heard me. Or if they did, they didn't care.
With nothing else to do, I put on my own clothes again, then wrapped my arms around my knees and hoped that my guys would find me soon.
Havel
“Shouldn’t she be back by now?” I asked, checking the time. “It’s been ages.”
