Page 17 of Protect Me
The sound of fingers snapping in front of my face rippled through my thoughts. I jerked back to life with a gasp.
My boss, Leslie, stood a few steps away. She peered at me, concern in her warm eyes.
“You all right?”
“Yes, sorry. Just thinking.”
“He must be pretty handsome to keep your thoughts so occupied.”
“No, he’s—“ I immediately stopped myself. Leslie illuminated like a Christmas tree and I bit back a swear word. Wow. I’d fallenrightinto that trap. Fortunately, she had mercy on me.
“I won’t press for details, but you’ve had your head in the clouds for a week now. Hope he’s worth it. In the meantime, I’m ducking across the street. We’re almost out of milk and I think the ice machine is trying to break. I’ll be back soon with reinforcements to get you through the rest of your shift, just in case.”
She disappeared out the front door before I could thank her. With a sigh, I gritted my teeth and let the full weight of my frustration sink in.
Oh, yes.
I’d been a space case for the last week. Only my head wasn’t floating in the clouds. Instead, my heart flopped around on the ground, and I constantly searched for it. My phone buzzed in my pocket, and I hated myself for hoping—again—that Vikram had actually texted me.
No such luck.
Vinita:Hey girl! Sounds like Vik is doing much better. He’s starting unsupported walking in PT, but still has another week or two before he can do it more frequently. Just wanted to thank you again for checking on him last week. How are you doing?
Katelyn:I’m glad! I hadn’t heard from him so I wondered.
I started at the message, decided it was innocuous enough, and sent it. Moments later, I regretted it and didn’t know why. With a growl, I shoved my phone back in my pocket. One more reason men were trouble.
Drama, drama, drama.
Except . . . that wasn’t true.
Vikram’s townhouse was the first time I’d broken rules 1, 2, and 4 in over five years. Never alone, never in the dark, don’t go anywhere new alone. Not only that, but I hadn’t once felt afraid while there. Alone in a strange house with a man I didn’t, for all intents and purposes, know that well.
Progress, certainly, but I couldn’t tell Vinita.
Because there was a moment of time in his apartment—okay, several of them—when my heart raced like a mad thing. When he looked at me in surprise, I melted like butter on a hot day. The way his jaw tightened and face muscles ticked. The grace of his bare chest. While he recovered from a serious infection after surgery, I ogled him.
Really, who could blame me?
No one.
Vikram had always been poetic. His love for cooking. His obsession with recycling. His affiliation for yoga and stretching. He presented himself to the world in a I-don’t-care-what-you-think kind of way, but held compassion tight in his grip.
The Vikram who spoke quietly with me in the dark had been the one I’d always secretly loved. The one I’d wanted glimpses of as often as I could find them. I saw more of the old Vik that night than the last several years combined.
Now, I just wanted to go back.
A foolish idea. I hadn’t gotten his number and he hadn’t used mine. Besides, Vik was a notorious womanizer. He swapped girls like I traded glasses, mostly to coordinate my outfit. Non-commitment was his thing and always had been.
Not me.
If the right guy meandered into my life and made the rules a moot point, then I’d settle into a happily ever after. Such an event seemed more and more unlikely as the years passed, because every month that ticked by made me cling to safety even more. The nightmare that I’d survived would never happen again.
Never again.
My favorite mantra.
My phone buzzed in my hand, pulling me from my spiral of darkening thoughts. Vinita popped up again, probably because I hadn’t responded and I’d been standing in the middle of the coffee shop like a weirdo for five minutes.
