Page 94 of Protect Me
“Who would?”
“No, I mean I’ve let her haunt me all through my adulthood. That period of my life has had . . . all this impact.” I spread my hands, frustrated with the truth of it. “Seeing her today forced me to realize how stupid I’ve been.”
She paused halfway through a bite of sushi, washed it down with a drink of water, and tilted her head.
“Now? You just realized it now?”
“Yes.” I laughed. The whole thing was out now, so I leaned into it. “Isn’t that wild? Emma walks into the store, we have the most awkward reunion ever, and she hurries out as quickly as she can. She has at least four kids, looks totally miserable, and could barely make eye contact with me. Then my brain sort of explodes when I realize I’ve been angry at her all this time and taking it out on women by being a serial dater. Picking them up and putting them down as heartlessly as she did to me.”
Kate blinked, her thick lashes hiding churning thoughts. Quiet rolled between us, burdened with all I’d just said. The unbuttoning of the past left me feeling more open than I had in years.
Clarity had such power.
“Those days are over,” I said when it all became too much. The verge of something glimmered on my horizon now. A welling energy bubbled up, fraught with power and excitement and something I couldn’t quite put my finger on.
I set my elbows on the table, hands steepled in front of me. Questions layered her wide eyes. I imagined if I pulled each back, one at a time, I’d never get to the bottom of Kate.
A breathless question came from her. “What does that mean?”
“It means . . .”
My reply stalled as I lost myself in her gaze. How honest could I be right now? Emma stirred up ideas and thoughts that swirled around Kate and lost opportunities and seizing the moment for the first time in my life. Would I frighten Kate if I told her what Ireallywanted to say?
Probably.
But that wouldn’t stop me.
I leaned forward. “When I saw Emma, I figured out what she never made me feel, even at the height of my obsession with her. With Emma, I never felt happy. I know that because it’s how I feel when I’m around you. Kate, you make me want to be better. You make me want to stay. You make me want to forget Emma and be a better Vik. Kate, I love you.”
ChapterTwenty-Three
KATELYN
Shock hit me like glacier towers.
Hard concrete.
Immobility.
Total suspension in time.
My breath caught in the back of my throat, suspended there. I couldn’t move. Didn’t breathe. Wasn’t entirely sure that what I’d just experienced was real. Had Vikramreallyjust laid himself bare?
Vikram?
Before I’d even given him the safety of doing so. Vikram had just taken a massive leap of emotional faith.
Right into me.
His intent gaze, locked on me, stabilized the seconds that followed his declaration. I swallowed, licked my lips.
Did he just say . .
No.
He couldn’t have.
Yet I didn’t imagine it. Did I? Was this one of those dreams that tortured me all the time? The ones where my ideal story played out, whispering across the landscape with surreal beauty, until the dream left me behind in the morning?
