Page 17 of Penance
The irritation I felt before the call out ramps up until my body practically vibrates with it. My jaw is tight, and my hands are in fists as I turn my head to look out my window, a sudden craving for whiskey washing over me.
It’s been almost two years since I’ve had a drink, but sometimes, when the pressure makes it hard to breathe, my body starts to crave the vice that makes it all go away. In reality, the pressure is still there, waiting for me to get sober again, but for one blissful second, it goes away.
“Chief, do you have a meeting with any of the boys from the police station today?” Johnson’s voice startles me out of my haze, and I jump, knocking my elbow against the door and cursing.
“What?” I bark, rubbing the spot where my arm bounced off the metal.
Johnson smiles and humor lights up his eyes.
I wonder what that would feel like—to be so unburdened by the world that you always see the good in it.
“Sorry, Chief. I didn’t mean to startle you. I was just wondering if you had a meeting with any of the boys at the police station?”
My brows furl as I narrow my eyes. More than I would like, my job overlaps with police business, meaning meetings come up that I would rather not attend, but there hadn’t been any on the schedule when I checked this morning. “No. Why?”
Johnson’s smile grows so big I’m afraid his face might split in two. “Because Hayes Miller is waiting for you at the station.”
He nods toward the station, and I follow his line of sight. And sure enough, Hayes is parked in front, leaning against his squad car with his arms crossed over his chest.
The man has been a thorn in my side since the day I arrived in town, but now that thorn is starting to fester.
“Of course he is,” I mutter under my breath.
Johnson chuckles, coming to a stop in the road right beside Hayes’s car.
“Don’t worry, Chief. We’ll take care of the truck,” he says with a glint in his eyes, and I hear the other men chuckle at my expense as I climb out and slam my door shut.
“I’m sure you will,” I grumble before facing Hayes. “Miller, what can I do for you?”
I expect the question to be answered with Hayes’s usual annoying smirk, but his face remains hard as he stares at me behind a pair of black sunglasses. Unease fills my gut and pushes the air from my lungs.
“Is Tanner okay?” I ask, my mind going to worst-case scenarios.
“Yeah,” Hayes says, still watching me. “He’s fine.”
A breath of air rushes back in, and I reach up rubbing my chest. “Then why are you here?”
Hayes stands, unfolding his arms and reaching for something in his car, still not answering. When he looks back at me, there’s remorse written all over his face.
I drop my gaze to the manila folder in his hands, and my heart starts beating so hard I’m sure he can see it through my shirt.
“Just know that I didn’t want to do this, Theo, but I figured it would be better coming from me than anyone else.”
None of his words register. My mind is stuck on the papers in his hands. I know what they are without him having to say. They are the same papers that changed my world sixteen years ago, and I know, without a shadow of a doubt, they will change my world again now.
“I’m sorry, Theo, but you’ve been served.”
Chapter 6
Theo
Custody papers. That’s what was in the envelope Hayes handed me.
I knew they were coming; at least, I should have. Josephine doesn’t like losing, and that’s exactly how she would have seen it when I got emergency custody of Tanner. She doesn’t care about our son or his well-being. She cares about her appearance, and to her, it made her look like a bad mother to lose custody. Not that I would argue that. Neither one of us has been what Tanner needed, but the difference is—I’m trying to be better. Josephine doesn’t want to. She’s selfish. It’s part of who she is.
My shift was only halfway over when Hayes showed up. I spent the rest of the day in my office with the door shut. I don’t do that often. I want my men to know they are welcome to come to me with anything, but I couldn’t handle it today. I am already toeing the edge of sober and drunk. One more push, and I’m afraid I’ll fall right over. So I keep my head down until the end of my shift, grunting a gruff goodbye as I walk out the door.
Only, apparently, today is the day that will never end because on the way to my truck, I spy Hayes standing outside again, waiting for me as he leans against his car.
