Page 10 of Virgo Type Sh*t
Shan burst into laughter. The way Ruth glared at her told me that I might have had it wrong. “Please don’t let that glory girl fool you. Her husband is Mega, and she’s let him put babies in her. You know what that means? His crazy DNA has mixed with hers, so that damn crazy also mixed in. The only difference is her ass is sneaky with her crazy,” Shan said with a serious tone.
Ruth’s eyes went upward to the ceiling when she sucked her teeth. “Shan, that is not true. I am not crazy, and my husband’s personality is not mine. This is not osmosis. Name one thing that I’ve done that was crazy.”
Shan’s head bucked back. “Best friend, are you really going to make me tell them your business?” She put her finger up. “Too late, I’m telling. You want just one? Okay, let me think of the best one.”
My giggles had already left me because the way Shan’s face looked while she thought about what she would tell us told itall. This was about to be good and funny as hell. This was an amazing introduction to these women.
“Got it! Do you remember when you visited that lady at her house to pray with her because she was a part of the sick and shut in at your new church? Ruth, in the midst of your prayer, you asked for the god of vengeance to fall upon her, to give her genital warts and stink breath if she ever flirted with your husband or any married man again. You asked God to fill her heart with the qualities of a virtuous woman and rid her of her whore tendencies,” Shan said with a straight face. “What kind of heathenish prayer is that?”
See, I knew it would be funny as hell. Everyone was in stitches except for Ruth. Her eyes were tight, arms crossed over her chest, and her lips were turned up. “First, that lady propositioned my husband. She called him and left a voicemail on his phone that she would love if he came over to pray for her and give her a special kind of Mega medicine. That was the prayer and desire of my heart. God already knew it, so I said it out loud. I mean, I prayed that she had the genital warts and stink breath because at the wildest chance Mega stupidly wants to slip, he’ll be turned off.
“No one likes warts or stink breath,” she quipped. “Mega despises stink breath. We got kicked out of a whole place of worship behind that distaste. I did pray for God to give her great qualities. Can we not forget that?”
Yeah, she was a special kind of crazy. That crazy backed by the Lord was a special crazy. “Ruth, that is kind of crazy, love,” I said.
She shrugged. “Well, from what I know about T.J., he’s a special kind of crazy. Welcome to theyour nigga is crazyclub.”
The waitress came in with the appetizers. She dropped my drink off when Shan discussed Mega’s DNA. I didn’t speak until she left the room. “Um, ladies, all we did was talk about apossible position at his company. That’s it. Plus, I can already tell that bitches be on him. I don’t have time for any of that after what I’ve been through.”
We all started to eat from the appetizers as we continued our lively conversation. “Hey, can I talk to you privately for a minute?” Galiana asked from her seat beside me. “It won’t take long.”
“Oh, yeah, sure.” We both wiped our hands, then rose from our seats. When she grabbed her drink, I grabbed mine too. Shit, I wasn’t sure what we were about to talk about. If she needed her drink, then I might also.
We went into another private room that was empty. From what I knew, this restaurant was owned by Galiana and Taelyn’s aunt. We took a seat across from each other at the table in the room. Galiana was a beautiful woman, but in my opinion, you could see the crazy in her ass. It didn’t matter how calm her demeanor was, because that crazy seeped through. I noticed that the first day that I met her.
“I wanted to talk to you about an opportunity. As you know, my family owns a franchise of mortuaries. Matter of fact, T.J.’s brother, O.J., is an owner of one.” She took a sip from her cup before she continued. “Along with our mortuaries, we also have a disposal or cleaning service.”
I assumed what she meant, but I wanted her to say it. “Ok, so you guys pick up trash or clean buildings or something?” I knew that wasn’t what they did, but sometimes, you just had to feign ignorance.
“No, that is not what we do. I’m going to be blunt with you for the sake of time. I know that I don’t have to worry about your discretion around this conversation. As far as your cousin is concerned and eventually T.J.. . .” She winked at me with a smile. “When it comes to them, I trust that you will know howmuch to tell them if you accept the opportunity that I am about to lay on the table in front of you.”
She leaned forward on the table. “The purpose of our disposal department is to dispose of eliminated, unwanted, or needed human capital that are no longer vital to the population on this Earth. Our job is to do it discreetly in all cases. Some clients request disposal that involves a disappearing act, while others request more of a discovery method for reasons such as life insurance and such. How do you feel about that?”
Her question confused me. “Do you want to know how I feel or what do I think? One in essence has nothing to do with the other in this conversation.” When she asked me to tell her what I thought, I nodded, then proceeded to do so. “I think that you have a very interesting business. I will go out on a limb and say that you are telling me this information to ask me to become an asset to your company. Am I correct?”
“Yes, you are correct. For historical reasons, I think it’s important for you to know that my father, who is known as Fabuloso, started the company, and it was passed down to me, his only daughter. He started the mortuaries because one, it’s lucrative in its own right, and it also provides a method of disposal that is extremely efficient,” she said with a smile. “Under my leadership, I decided to extend our mortuary business by way of franchise. That was a great decision that has benefited all involved.”
I smiled at that needed information. “That is good information to have. May I ask what opportunity is it that you would like to extend to me?”
“I am looking for an apprentice or a right hand if you will. One day, probably sooner than later, I will want to retire. I want this retirement to happen before my son is a teenager. Plus, in the next two years, I want to give my bigheaded ass husband another baby.”
I giggled when she rolled her eyes. “Stop acting like you don’t want to give that man a baby. Look at you already planning ahead in anticipation of it.”
“Girl, hush.” She waved me off. “That is the opportunity. To become my apprentice and let me take you under my wing so that, hopefully, one day you can lead. My children may want to go this route or not. If that time comes, I expect you to take them under your wing.”
I thought about her request. “I assume that you have others that have worked with you for a while. Why are you outsourcing this? I would think that you want someone from within the company. I’m sure there are others who would want that opportunity.”
“That may be true, but that’s not what it’s going to be.” She put her hand up. “Let me take a step back. That may not be what it’s going to be. I saw something in you when I came to New Mexico that impressed me. However, as we work together, I may see that you aren’t the leader I need. Either way, I do want to bring you on.”
I nodded. “How would that work? I still want to work in my field if I’m offered a position at Burke Manufacture Homes. Also, if I did accept and it worked with my schedule, what is the pay structure?”
“You’re free to have your career with your future boo. Most of the work that we do is in the late evening or the wee hours of the morning. Your schedules shouldn’t overlap much, if ever. As far as pay, it’s an exempt, annual salary in the beginning. If you accept, we can discuss the number.”
My brows furrowed. “I don’t care for that answer. I need to make sure the number is worth potentially putting my freedom and life in jeopardy. I make great money as an electrician, so it’s not as if I need extra income. Also, let’s consider that we are talking about a very salacious career.”
“That’s fair.” She sat there for a second. “In the beginning of your tenure with my company, you will not be hands on. A lot of it will be you with me, overseeing to see how it all works. I want you to learn different methods, give feedback, etcetera. With that being said, I think a comfortable beginning salary is three hundred thousand.”
My head swayed from ear to ear a few times before I spoke. “I could entertain that. Let me ask, how will this be accounted for? I’m sure you can’t say that I work hiding bodies. That three hundred thousand has to be accounted for, unless you plan for me to keep it in a safe in my home.”
