Page 23 of Virgo Type Sh*t
My father pushed his shoulder with a hearty laugh. “Boy, y’all ass got lucky. A bet is a bet though.” My father reached in his pocket, flaked off ten one-hundred-dollar bills, then handed them to him. I stood there like a fly on the wall that no one noticed.
“That what dat hell I talkin’ about,” T.J. said with a prideful smile. He counted the money like he didn’t just see my father count it out. “It was nice doing business with you, Pop Dee.” He reached out to me to take the money. “That’s yours.”
My father looked at me for a moment before he shook his head. “Y’all get y’all asses in here. Ya mama in there cooking up a storm.”
That made me smile because my mother cooked her ass off. She taught me to do the same. “Mommy!” When I was around my mother, I felt like that seven-year-old girl that loved to follow her around everywhere. You couldn’t tell me that I wasn’t going to be exactly like my mother. Everything that Brandy Henderson was, I wanted to be.
“My lil baby!” My mother turned from the pot on top of the stove to open her arms for me to come into them. She hugged me tightly before she pulled back and kissed my forehead. “You are so beautiful, looking just like your fine ass mama.”
I giggled because that was always her response when she saw me. I felt T.J. before I saw him. “Mommy, this is Tumnus or T.J.” My chest poked out as I introduced him.
“So, you’re the one that stays on the phone with my husband during those football games.” There was a smile on my mommy’s face. She hugged him just as tight as she hugged me. “Thank you because before you, he tried to get me to watch them with him.”
We all laughed when my father’s bottom lip dropped. “Baby, I thought you liked watching the games with me. That’s messed up.”
My mother walked over to my father and wrapped her arms around his waist. “I love doing other things with you.” My scoff was loud when she kissed his lips a little more passionately than I thought she should have in my presence. “The food is ready, so let’s eat.”
My mother cooked a pot roast, which apparently was what T.J. requested.No one asked me what I wanted to eat.Although the meal was catered to T.J., my mother still made my favorite candied yams. It was quiet when we started to eat. Once everyone had their fill, my mother asked whether I spoke to TorTela.
Before I could respond, T.J.’s lopsided head ass chortled. “If you call beatin’ that lady up, then yeah, she talked. I think she gave her a concussion if we bein’ honest.”
My finger went up before anyone could say anything. “First of all, I did talk to her. She spoke with me in a reckless manner. I struck her because she said that Faheeta was capable of having live babies when I couldn’t.”
My mother turned her head so that her ear was in my direction. “That bitch said what? Yeah, I’m happy you sent her bitch ass daughter to hell. Let’s see her have a baby in hell.”
The gasp that left my mouth was loud. I didn’t know that my mother knew what I did. My father never told me that he told her. “Mommy, I didn’t know that you . . . you know.”
My mother’s face scrunched. “Lil’ girl, my husband tells me everything within reason. That was within reason because it was about you. Was I happy about your manic action? Absolutely not. Did I understand it? Absolutely!”
“Yeah, there was no way that I wouldn’t tell my wife about how craziness was passed down from her to you,” my father saidwith a laugh. “Tell me, Brandy, how would you describe your manic action when you lit Jacora Sanderson’s hair on fire?”
T.J. and I laughed. “Mommy, what! Why would you do something like that?”
The way my mother’s face contorted lightened my laugh. “I know you’re not acting like your ass didn’t electrocute two people. That Jacora heifer is still alive.” Her attention turned toward my father. “Derrick, I find it funny that after over thirty plus years, you still remember that heifer’s name.”
“Brandy, I will never forget her name because I will never forget that core memory. When a core memory is made, you remember every detail about what made it to the core.” His brow shimmied up his forehead. “Now, tell your daughter why you did it.”
“Yeah, I wanna know dis too,” T.J. blurted. “Either way it go, y’all like fire. Meek could have caught those folks on fire putting all that electricity in dem.”
He had one more time to say something before I cursed his ass out. When he saw the tightness on my face, he leaned toward me and kissed my temple. His lips went to my ear. “Those tight brows don’t do anything but make my dick hard. Be careful before I have you bent over in your old bedroom, fucking the shit out of you.”
My eyes darted between my mother and father. T.J.’s voice wasn’t loud at all, but there was still a fear that they’d heard what he said. I loved that he loved to fuck me. There was a certain level of toxicity in our relationship that I wasn’t sure whether it was healthy or not. Things that would turn most men off, got me dick.
“We didn’t hear whatever he said in your ear that I’m sure we wouldn’t want to hear,” my mother said with her own arched brow. “Back to the subject at hand. The reason I tested the flammability of the young lady’s hair was because your fatherand I were sitting outside during lunch, and she thought it would be a good idea to use his lap as a seat. It was no secret to anyone that me and your father were a couple. The damn squirrels knew.”
T.J. held his hand up like he was in a classroom with a question. “You were in high school when you lit someone’s hair on fire? Wow!”
“Um, yes. Disrespect is not okay no matter the age,” my mother responded. “Anyway, from where she sat on Derrick’s lap, I could smell the hairspray. She wore one of those scrunch hairstyles with the back flip curls. I just wanted to show her that it should always be safety first. I put a lighter to the tip of a curl and it lit up like a grill.” She shrugged her shoulders like it was nothing.
My father fell into a fit of laughter, and T.J. soon joined him. Next, my mother followed with her laughter which inevitably pulled me in as well. My family was crazy. I sat and ate with my crazy family. Most of the conversation was between my father and my man. There was no need for me to worry about whether or not my parents liked my man. From the vibe, they loved him, which was great, because I loved him too.
Some Time Later . . .
Back In Charleston
“I sent a video to their mamas. They should be fine . . . mad,but fine,” Mauri said. This woman was amazing. I wouldn’t be surprised if she was on some kind of most dangerous hackers list. Not the list that everyone knew about, but the one that only the top people in the highest level of government saw. When I asked her how she was able to send them a video and what did they say on the video, she stared at me like I was insulting her intelligence.Maybe I should just trust what she said and not worry about the how.
Her eyes rolling back in her head confirmed that I in fact was on her nerves. “If you must know, artificial intelligence is a muthafucka. I happen to be amongst the best in the world to manipulate it. Creating a video of your fuck ass ex and his bitch was light work. It was actually boring. As far as what I had them say, basically that they never really wanted a child. She was a mistake.
