Page 132 of Breakout
I’m shocked at his words. We never spoke of his family much. I always got the feeling he didn’t have a good relationship with them.
“I don’t know if I’ve ever said it, but I really hate your parents. How could they be so blind? You’re an amazing man, and you aren’t a puppet for them to control. Your father is a fool, and it just makes me so mad.” I urge him to believe me.
“See, that right there. You’re the best person I know, Peyton. Now you know how I feel when you talk down about yourself.”
He’s right. I know he’s right. I can’t undo all the trauma in my head, though. I don’t know if I will ever be able to get over it.
“I don’t know what to say to that. I can’t help who I am. This is what I mean. You don’t deserve to have to deal with this. We weren’t supposed to be real. You were supposed to go on with your life and be happy. I’m trying to be selfless here, Beck. I want you to have the woman of your dreams. Someone the media won’t tear down at every chance they can.”
“Fuck the media. I don’t give a fuck what they say, Peyton. I don’t know if you realize this, but hockey isn’t the most important thing in my life anymore. If they want to talk shit about you, I will defend you to my last breath. I don’t give a fuck about all that. There’s only one thing important in my life now.”
“What?”
“You.”
My heart stops.
Surely I didn’t hear him right, right?
It can’t be true. It feels too good to be true.
“What did you say?” I ask breathlessly.
“It’s you.” The words fall from my lips.
It’s true. She’s the only one for me. It will only be her.
“What are you saying, Beck? Spell it out for me because I need it to be clear.” She looks both desperate and hopeful.
“You’re it. My seven minutes.” My heart is thundering in my chest.
She looks confused. “What does that even mean?”
“I read once that after someone dies, their brain remains alive for a short period of time to replay all the happiest memories. It’s a coping thing or something. They estimate it happens for seven minutes. It’s you, Peyton. You’re my seven minutes.”
She gasps at my words. I don’t give her a chance to say anything, though, and I continue on.
“Before you, the only thing I had going for me was hockey. It was the only bit of my life that brought me any real joy, but I knew it was going to end as soon as I graduated. I was set to go to hell. Sure, my friends would offer me some distractions from real life, but nothing truly made me happy. Not until I met you. You changed my life, Peyton. Whether you believe it or not, you are it for me. Everyone gets their one great love, and for me, it’s you.”
Dropping to my knee, I pull out the ring that has been in my pocket for weeks, waiting for the right time to ask her to make this real.
“Peyton Marie Anderson, we are already married in the eyes of the court, but I want you to change your last name and become my wife for real. For God and everyone to see. I don’t want to hide the best thing that’s ever happened to me. I want to scream it from the mountaintops. What do you say? Will you be my wife still?”
She’s sobbing as she manages, “I don’t know what to say.”
I want to tell her to say yes. Simply give me what I want, but that wouldn’t be right. So instead, I tell her what is best for her as I always do.
“Say whatever you feel in your heart. If it’s not me, then I’ll get up and sign the papers without question as soon as you’re ready for it. I won’t make this difficult for you. I only want you to be happy. If it’s without me, then so be it.”
My own throat is growing itchy as my eyes water at the thought of losing her. It would kill me.
She reaches her hand out, cupping my cheek as I continue to hold out the ring.
I let my eyes fall closed. If this is the last touch I ever get, I want to savor it.
Then she says the one word that could make my world stop.
“Yes.”
