Page 79 of Breakout
Then he holds me like that. I don’t know how long because I fall asleep, but when I wake up sometime later, he’s still wrapped around me as my computer screen is dark with no sunlight filtering through the windows. The heating pad has grown cold from the timer, but his arm still holds it into place.
Instead of questioning it, I burrow in deeper, holding his arm to me as I let myself fall back into a blissful sleep.
“Where were you last night?” Brett asks as he laces his shoes up next to me as I do the same with my skates.
I hate that I can’t tell him the truth. Instead, I have to make up yet another lie. It’s the only thing about this whole thing with Peyton that I wish I could change.
“I went for a drive.”
He frowns. “Is it your father again?”
My father. Usually the root of all of my problems. He actually is still bothering me. I’ve just stopped answering his calls. I only have a few months left here. The worst he can do is stop my allowance, but I’d survive.
“Something like that,” I mumble.
He sighs. “I get it, man. You have this whole life ahead of you, and then BAM! Something comes and changes all the plans you thought you made.”
“What’s that mean?” I ask him, aware that this isn’t about me.
“My life isn’t going like I want it to,” he admits as he straightens up to give me his full attention.
I do the same, looking around to see if anyone is paying attention to us. Everyone is slowly filtering out to the rink like we are supposed to do.
I won’t push this off another time, though. If he is ready to talk, fuck practice. Some things are more important.
“Is it about the injury? I know it sucks, but you have another year to show the scouts what you’ve got. I’m sure you will still be drafted.”
“Do I even want to be drafted? Do I want to play for a team with strangers? Sure, I love playing hockey, but I mostly love it because I get to play it with all of you.”
“What are you saying, man? You played with another team before college. It will be just like that.”
“Not really. I played with another team, but I never grew close to them. Not the way I have you guys. You and Clay areleaving at the end of the year. I get at least another year with Kel and Wyatt, but it won’t be the same.”
“It won’t be, but that’s okay. That’s how life works. We always knew we wouldn’t be drafted together. Honestly, with Clay and me being drafted first, you have a better chance of ending up on a team with us.”
“Is that what I really want, though? Is it what is best for me?”
I frown. “Where is this coming from, man? You haven’t been your happy-go-lucky self lately. What prompted this?”
He shrugs. “Life changed. I gained a new perspective. Now I need to figure out what I want to do with it.”
He stands, so I do too. I pull him into a hug.
“What are you doing?” He tries to push me away.
“Nope. You hug us when we are upset, so just accept it. You get hugs too. Bring it in, man.”
He fights it for a moment longer before giving in and hugging me. When we pull back, I pat him on the shoulder.
“I don’t know what brought on this new perspective, but all you need to do is choose a path that will make you happy. It doesn’t have to be the same path you have been on. If there’s a fork and you want to abandon the old one, then do it. No matter what, we will be here at your back supporting you as we always do. You’re my brother. No matter where life takes us, that will never change. Time and distance can’t touch it. Got it?”
He pushes my shoulder. “You sound like a chick now. Is that what you’ve been off doing? Learning how to sound more like a chick? I don’t think that will help you get laid.”
He chuckles, making me laugh too. He sounds a little bit more like himself, which is all I wanted. We start out to the rink, still chatting along the way.
“I forgot toxic masculinity says we can’t tell our friends we love them. Fuck them. I love you, Brett. I’m not scared to tell the world.”
“Oh god, are you professing your love for one another? It would explain so much,” Clay jokes.
