Page 63 of Fang
Bailey grabs my arm, pulling me into some room, shutting the door behind us.
“Hey, it’s okay. You’re safe. The guys won’t let anything happen to us,” she tells me.
I wish reassurance would make it go away. My breaths are shallow as my heart tingles in my chest. I feel like I am going to have a heart attack. I hate feeling this way. I hate that something as simple as a rowdy crowd breaking glass could trigger this.
I thought I could handle it, but I can’t. What if I can’t handle Fang’s lifestyle at all?
“This isn’t working,” Bailey mumbles to herself.
Something bangs outside, making me jump. Bailey curses.
“Well, fuck. I guess I have to do it,” Bailey says.
I look at her, unable to ask her what she means.
“So when Savage was six, he once peed his pants. Seriously, full-on peed all over the front of his pants.”
I don’t know why she is telling me this, but it is giving me something else to focus on.
“Yeah, I know. You want to know why. Well, I didn’t know it at the time, but he had a crush on me and didn’t want to let me out of his sight. He had asked me to go to the bathroom with him, but I didn’t have to go, so he held it until he couldn’t anymore.”
I suck in another breath as I can feel my lips upturn a little.
That’s actually really sweet.
“It wasn’t sweet, like I can tell you are thinking. He’s an idiot. He’s done all sorts of things over the years in my name.” She shakes her head.
My heart is feeling less tight. “Tell me about some of them.”
I feel like I’m choking, but what she’s doing is working. I’m thinking about her and Savage rather than what’s going on outside that door.
I take a deep breath. Then another.
“When I was thirteen, I started my period at school. He noticed before I did and cut himself so people thought the blood was from him. What kind of sane kid does that?” she asks.
I reach out for her hand. She gives it to me immediately as I squeeze it.
“A kid in love.” I sound stronger.
“Well, he was an idiot kid. When Larry Finkleman made fun of me in the sixth grade, Savage hung him on the flagpole by his underwear, then made him apologize to me.” Bailey rolls her eyes.
“Wait, people actually do that?” I laugh a little, feeling much better now.
“Savage sure did. He had a thing for old-school teen movies. I think he learned all his moves from there.”
“That’s really sad.” I let out another laugh, my chest feeling a little achy but normal. “Thank you, Bailey. I think I’m okay now.”
I let go of her hand.
She nods. “Can I ask what happened out there, or will that make it worse again?”
I shrug. “Talking about it doesn’t cause the panic. I have some childhood trauma related to violence. I think it was the glass breaking that triggered it.”
She nods. “I’m sorry. I’ve never helped someone having a panic attack before.”
“I don’t honestly know how I get myself out of them, to be honest, but talking helped. I don’t think I was in a full-fledged attack either. If I get that bad, I’m replaying the violence over and over again. It wasn’t like that this time.” I tell her.
“Well, the guys are handling all the rowdy guys out there, so don’t worry. I meant what I said. Savage and Fang won’t let anything happen to us. Neither will the rest of the guys. Well, the ones from this chapter. I don’t know the other chapter well.”
