Page 108 of Fixation
What does he expect in return? What’s his endgame?
Seriously, how could he let me go?
There’s evidence that he’s been here. His fingerprints must be on my clothes. My washing machine. My mail.
I wouldn’t have to work hard to prove my case to the cops.
They’d find the cameras that he hid. They have the tools for the job.
You’ll walk out of here today with your cunt sore and your head a mess. With your heart belonging to me.
The ghost of his words rakes down my back. My teeth lock. I flatten a hand against the wall for balance.
I want him. I need him. I—fuck.
“Boss?”
Deep breath. “What is it, Emersyn?”
“Werner emailed you this morning. Asked if you could call him. Said it was personal. You want me to call him back for you?”
Werner, Werner, Werner. Who the fuck is Werner?
Right. My website designer.
Where has my mind gone?
To Anderson, that’s where.
Sigh.
“No, email him through my account.” This is the worst time to deal with another man. “See what he wants.”
“You got it.” She starts typing. In slow steps, as if I’m playing hide and seek, I leave my bedroom, heading to my studio on the other side of the hall. “Hey, boss?”
“I’m here.”
“Good to have you back.” Emersyn ends the call before I can tell her that I’m not actually back.
The old me, who had no obsessive thoughts over a man, who didn’t get off on rough sex and cold stares, is gone.
Anderson put that girl to rest. He shaped me into a new one, a woman who’s a stranger and who somehow feels so much more like me.
For some reason, I don’t mourn her.
My blood boils as heat pools between my legs. This isn’t right. This isn’t okay.
Work. I promised myself I’d focus on that, and that’s what I’m doing.
As I predicted, as soon as I step into my studio, my anxiety lessens. Being here feels like a homecoming.
It brings me peace.
Nothing was touched in here. My sturdy workbench is in the center of the room where it’s always been. My tools and blow torch are in the same organized mess I know and love.
Anderson let me keep a part of myself.
He likes this part of me.
