Page 51 of Stick With Me
She shakes her head, turning back to the window as her voice drops to a near whisper. “Never mind.”
TWENTY-ONE
Why didI agree to this again?
“It’s going to be good for you,” Natalie says, reading my mind. Her face is on my iPad, propped up against my bathroom mirror as I get ready for thisdate. The word leaves a bad taste in my mouth.
In the three days since I agreed to this, I’ve come close to backing out at least a dozen times. The only thing stopping me is the thought of Jace’s pissed-off face when he sees me moving on. At this point, the opportunity to fill my plus-one for Sunday isn’t a factor; my focus is solely on giving my ex a taste of his own medicine.
The actual date holds no appeal. It still feels oddly wrong.
I understand where Ada and Natalie are coming from—I should finally experience dating as an adult and open myself up to new possibilities. But I can’t shake the feeling that this is a mistake.
Ryan’s reaction the other night didn’t exactly put me at ease, either.
As I count down the minutes until I have to leave, my stomach churns with… something I can’t quite explain, but it doesn’t feel good. No butterflies or anticipation. It feels more like taking a shot in the dark on a multiple-choice test—scribbling in a bubble even when you know you're more likely to get it wrong than right.
“You look beautiful, but you better get going. Isn’t your reservation in twenty minutes?” Natalie’s voice pulls me out of my thoughts, making me pause mid-brush through my hair.
Shoot, she’s right. “Yeah, let me call an Uber. Wish me luck!”
“You’re gonna kill it, girl. And don’t forget to have fun,” she says before ending the call.
My nerves only get worse during the ride to the restaurant. By the time the car pulls up outside, I feel like I’m going to be sick, but it’s accompanied by a determination to see this thing through.
James—the “sweetheart” guy—picked an upscale wine bar for our date. It’s fancier than I would’ve chosen, preferring casual restaurants to the overly snooty, but I try to keep an open mind. As I approach, he gets up from the table. He’s handsome, with a polished and neat appearance, but I’m not sure he’s my type. He’s not as tall as I imagine, at least six inches shorter than Ryan.
We exchange slightly awkward introductions, and I take the seat opposite him. I start with a safe question, asking him what he does for a living. Apparently, he’s passionate about his job as an investment banker because he manages to talk about it nonstop for twenty minutes, barely coming up for air. At this point, I think I could give a TED Talk on his résumé.
“It’s like being a financial adviser on steroids. I work closely with my team to evaluate the financial health of companies, assess risks, and develop creative solutions to meet our clients’ goals. I have a team of nine working under me,” he says, pausing, presumably waiting for me to sing his praises.
I nod and smile politely, hoping that’s the end of his monologue and chastising myself for assuming only athletes were egotistical.
I choke down another sip of red wine. Normally, I’m a white wine girl, but my date didn’t ask before ordering a bottle of red for us. There’s only one kind of red I actually like, but I can’t remember the name.Pinot? Cabernet? No, something less common.I’m tempted to pull out my phone to ask Ryan, but even I know it’s bad form to text on a date.
“What do you do, Hannah?” James asks, pulling me back into the conversation.
“I’m actually starting a non-profit, foster-based animal rescue.” Which reminds me, I still need to send in the incorporation paperwork my lawyer helped me draft. And I can add finding a date for the fundraiser to my to-do list, because, despite my friends’ wishful thinking, I already know it won’t be James.
“Oh, how philanthropic of you.” He smirks.
I tilt my head, narrowing my eyes slightly. “I guess. I’ve been volunteering at shelters since I was a teenager. I have a soft spot for animals, and I want to help save as many as I can.”
“Is that going to be a financially rewarding venture?”
I laugh, but when I see his stoic expression, I realize he isn’t joking. “I don’t think anyone gets into animal rescue for the money.”
“Looks like I’ll have to be the breadwinner,” he teases with a wink.
Don’t roll your eyes. Don’t do it, Hannah.“You have a dog, right?” I ask, giving him a chance to redeem himself.
“I do. Chip. He’s a purebred English Springer Spaniel. I saw him in the pet shop window and couldn’t resist taking him home. Maybe after this, you could come back to mine and meet him?”
I bite my lip, holding back a rant about pet shops and puppy mills. And in what universe does he think this date is going well enough for me to go back to his place? I shake my head, hoping it’s enough to shut down the idea. “So, what are you looking for? Relationship-wise, I mean.” I take a sip of wine to give my hands something to do. “This is actually my first date since my broken engagement,” I add, immediately cringing.
James doesn’t seem bothered by my poor date etiquette, easily rolling with the punches. “So you’re not looking for anything serious, then, if you just got out of a relationship?”
Points for James—he gets it.Though he probably assumes it’s because I’m still hung up on my ex. The truth is I just don’t want to end up with someone like Jace again. Someone who will derail my focus on myself and my own plans. I refuse to lose myself in someone else’s orbit, and the easiest way to avoid that is by steering clear of getting involved with anyone. But I’m not about to spill my guts to a stranger I’m certain I’ll never see again.
