Page 36 of A Bride By Morning
“I wasn’t in a position to respond,” he said simply. “Why are you nervous?”
She suddenly wished they weren’t in front of the Arundell’s residence, moments away from reentering society. She longed to be back at Meadowcroft, where she might hear an answer to the queries that plagued her.Why didn’t you write me? What happened to you after Kabul?
What did the world do to you?
But Lydia swallowed her questions. She let herself trail her gloved fingertips across the back of his hand, gratified by his sudden intake of breath. “I hardly knew what to say in society the day you found me in Lord Coningsby’s study. I don’t know how to be Lord Montgomery’s wife.”
His thumb stroked her palm, intercepting her touch. “What’s your worry? That they won’t like you?”
Gabriel’s caress was distracting her. It made her think of kisses. Of his lips between her thighs in the library. She wanted him to touch her like that again.
Lydia let out a long breath to calm herself. “Perhaps I’m worried they’ll think I’m not good enough for you.”
His fingers skimmed up her wrist. “Wouldn’t that make them fucking foolish?” he murmured. “If they had any sense, they would comprehend that you’re too good for me.”
“Gabriel . . .”
He raised her hand to his lips and pressed a kiss to her gloved palm. “You’re the perfect Lady Montgomery,” he said, “because you’re you. Yes?” Lydia couldn’t respond; his touch had robbed her of words. “May I open the door now, or shall we court further scandal?”
Lydia let out a laugh. “I think we’ve courted enough scandal, don’t you?”
Another slight smile touched his face. It warmed her. It was small, but it was real. “Never,” he said.
But then he opened the door and stepped outside to help Lydia down. The grip of his hand sent another shiver through her. His touch was a gift bestowed in small increments, and she longed for more.
As if he read her thoughts, Gabriel’s eyes flared with heat. Nearby chatter drew his attention to their surroundings—to the people exiting their own carriages—and his countenance shifted. That small, genuine smile he’d gifted her switched into the pleasant facade of Lord Montgomery, a performance that seemed to her to be as effective as a boundary around his heart.
But then his head dipped toward hers. “Just breathe, sweetheart,” he murmured in a voice as smooth as honey.
A few people outside glanced at them curiously as Gabriel led her up the front steps and gave their name to the doorman. He permitted them inside and took their coats. As Gabriel and Lydia entered the receiving room, they caught the attention of the other attendees.
It was strange to be the focus of so many inquisitive stares. For years, Lydia lingered in her remote corner of the ballroom, avoiding everyone but Lady Derby and the other matrons. She had unconsciously telegraphed a message of inaccessibility:my heart has been claimed. I’m not available.Eventually, the signal was so clear that it became an unmistakable warning to everyone tempted to speak with her; she might as well have been invisible.
So she became known for being aloof. Her demeanor was that of an ice queen.
But now . . .
“They’re all staring at me,” Lydia whispered to Gabriel.
“Of course, they’re staring at you,” he said. Then he dipped his head to her ear, indecently close. “Let them appreciate how fucking beautiful you look, Lydia.”
The words, spoken for her alone, brought a smile to her face. He thought she looked beautiful? Nearby, she heard a few ladies gasp and whisper to each other.
Gabriel was deliberate in his methods—every touch and lingering look conveyed a husband utterly enchanted with his new wife. He cradled Lydia’s hand in his. The way his thumb brushed across the wrist of her gloved hand drew numerous pointed stares from ladies as they chatted behind their fans.
Do you admire me?She wanted to ask him.Am I really the only woman you’ve ever wanted? Or am I just another mark to perform for, like everyone in this room?
She had so many questions she longed to ask. Each was further evidence that her armor was failing, growing rusted and vulnerable each time he looked at her. She needed to remember that this smile, too, was false. She shouldn’t let herself love someone who lived so much of his existence in a performance.
“Lord and Lady Montgomery!” Lydia and Gabriel turned as Lady Arundell bustled over, smiling wide in greeting. “Welcome. I’m so glad you could replace the Crombies on such short notice.”
“It’s our pleasure,” Gabriel said warmly. His grin was so dazzling it almost hurt to look at him directly. “And a pleasant birthday to you, Lady Arundell. You’re as radiant as a debutante.”
The older woman blushed, and Lydia could hardly blame her. When Gabriel entered society as Lord Montgomery, he could sell seawater to fishermen.
“You’re such a flatterer, my lord,” Lady Arundell tittered. “We’ve missed you since your departure to Meadowcroft.” Lady Arundell’s attention fell on Lydia, as if just noticing her. “But you’ve married. My congratulations to you both.”
Lydia forced her own smile. “Thank you.”
