Page 20 of Fractured Grief
His booming laugh filled the room. “You’re such a tease. You know I’m worth it.” He waggled his white eyebrows.
“That you are. That you are.”
We settled into comfortable silence as I finished packing, ensuring I had everything. Shuffling over to his bed, I rested my butt on the edge.
“Feel free to t-text me whenever you want while you’re stuck here. Even if it’s to complain about the food. I’m always happy to listen.” I patted his knee, knowing he couldn’t feel it but respecting his boundaries. He’d mentioned his injuries and the fact that his legs are still normal legs, even if he couldn’t feel them anymore. He wanted people to treat him normally, even though he was now a paraplegic. He seemed to have taken that news in stride, like it was nothing out of the ordinary. And in the time we’d shared a room, I hadn’t once seen him melancholy or emotional. He was stronger than I would’ve been in his situation.
“Oh, I will,” he said. “And you can tempt me with all the treats and deliciousness you get to enjoy and will eventually bring me.”
“Count on it.”
“Geiá sou, Sebastian,” Ma said as she strode into the room with Theo close behind.
“Hi, Ma. Theo. You remember Alfie?” I gestured at Alfie as he sent them a radiant smile.
“Of course! How are you doing, Alfie?” Ma asked.
“Very well, thank you, ma’am. I must say you look lovely today,” Alfie responded, ever the smooth talker. He and Lyric were so alike.
“Alfie, you charmer. I’ve told you tocall me Kat.”
“Sorry, of course, you look beautiful today… Kat,” Alfie said, winking at Ma.
I had to roll my eyes. Alfie was a total flirt, but really, my Ma? Come on! “That’s enough, s-stud. Leave my ma alone.”
“Well, at least I know there is beauty in your family tree. I couldn’t tell from having to look at you every day, you beast.” He sent me a wink, always happy to give me a hard time.
“Yeah, yeah. Don’t be a stranger, okay?” I gave him an imploring look. I would check in on him whenever possible.
“I heard you, and don’t worry, you’ll be sick of me before too long with how often I’m going to text you. Take care of yourself.”
“I will.” Turning, I leaned over Alfie and hugged him. “You take care, too.”
Rising carefully, I headed over to my bed to help grab my bags, but Theo already had them and was holding out my cane.
“Thanks, bro.” I took my cane and made my way to the door. “I’ll be s-seeing you, Alfie.” With a wave and goodbyes from Ma and Theo, we left.
I was going back to what was familiar, my hometown. The place I’d grown up. But I felt off, like I’d left a part of myself behind. I wasn’t quite whole. I wasn’t the same person I’d been before being shot. I reminded myself to breathe and used Levi’s recommended CBT techniques, but I couldn’t shake the foreign feeling in my gut.
I’d changed.
Chapter 11
Indy
Hazel hadn’t been thrilled about having to go to before-school care. On the whole, she was such a well-behaved, mature kid, but sometimes, or I should say recently, she’d been getting a little sassier with me, almost to the point of being rude. She’d started to talk back a little, not doing what I asked when I asked, and she was spending more time in her room with her door closed. That part, especially, was unlike her.
It made me feel so much lonelier than usual. I didn’t know how to help her.
To make matters worse, we’d argued before I’d dropped her off this morning, and I’d had to leave her almost crying on the school’s doorstep. Seeing her look of betrayal and sadness hurt me more than I cared to admit. Everything was finally catching up with both of us.
Lexi’s birthday was coming up. This first one, without her, would be difficult. No doubt that was adding to Hazel’s behavior.
I needed to focus. Today was my first appointment visiting Seb at his home. I needed to ensure I checked everything and addressed any concerns he was having, but I couldn’t get Hazel’s tear-filled eyes and look of betrayal out of my head. When she hurt, I hurt.
Then Bon Jovi’s “Livin’ on a Prayer” came on the radio, and it was the last straw to my already frayed nerves. I gave in to the tears that had been threatening to come for the last forty minutes of this trip. This was one of Lexi’s anthems. We’d rock out to this song and many other “hair bands” whenever we needed a pick-me-up during, and this was the first time I’d heard it since she’d died. Knowing I would never see her grab her hairbrush and belt out the tune while jumping around our living room again, crushed me.
I still couldn’t believe she was gone.
