Page 56 of Wish You Once More
But if it was a nightmare, what was Bree doing in it?
She was anything but.
The tentative plans we had for a reunion hung by a thread.
I had no idea what the future would hold.
Bree had to be in that future whatever happened.
I wasn’t letting her go again.
Live was too precious, too short.
My eyes flew open and I stared at Bree. Her face was etched with concern.
“We’ll get through this, Mat,” she said. “I’m here for you.”
I leaned over and buried my head in her shoulder, breathing in her familiar perfume. The scent comforted me, enveloping me in her. She was everything I needed right now. Extricating myself from her cocoon, I stood up and held out my hand.
“Let’s go to bed.”
She stared up at me. “Mat, I don’t think that’s a good idea…”
“To sleep. Nothing more. I need to hold you, to feel your skin against mine.”To never let you go,I added silently.
“Oh.” Bree nodded, then got to her feet and followed me into the bedroom.
Neither of us spoke as we shed our clothes and slid underneath the cool covers. We snuggled together skin on skin, me spooning her, hands cupping her tits, one leg between hers. She held her arms over mine, pulling me as close as she could. I held her while her breathing regulated, and she drifted off into sleep. On the other hand, I couldn’t rest, couldn’t relax, as my mind span over the events of the day. How something so good had happened, only to be trumped by one of the worst possible things to ever happen to me. Bree stirred and I hugged her as tight as I could without waking her. If I believed in another being, then he truly did believe in giving with one hand and taking with the other.
In the end, I slept fitfully, waking in denial and then remembering everything with utter clarity. When I was convinced I wasn’t going to get any more rest, I slipped out of bed, leaving Bree to sleep. I pulled on a pair of tracksuit bottoms and a t-shirt and headed into the living room. My phone had lain dormant in a drawer in the kitchen since I’d got back from Darthampton. Heart in my mouth, I opened it and pulled it out. Finding the charger, I plugged it in and then switched it on. Within seconds, the screen went crazy, lit up with message after message. I scrolled through the communications, seeing Melinda’s name, Ellie’s name, but nothing from Jonny. I listened to the voicemails from Melinda. Her tone in each one became more and more anxious the closer it got to Dad’s end.
Silent tears streaked my face and I swallowed hard, trying to compose myself.
I should have stayed longer.
I should have tried to make things right with Jonny.
I shouldn’t have run away just because he told me to go.
Swiping my hand across my face, I knew I needed to come up with a plan.
My laptop was on the coffee table. Moving across the room, I dropped down on the sofa and fired it up. It only took me a few minutes to sort out train tickets back to Darthampton, leaving in two hours time.
We’d be back home by early afternoon, then I could start to rebuild all the bridges I’d broken, if they’d let me.
28
Bree
When my eyes fluttered open, for a moment I wondered where I was. The ceiling didn’t look like the one in my bedroom, and the duvet covering me definitely didn’t smell like mine. I pushed myself up onto my elbows and looked around the room.
Mat’s room, not mine.
Reality had me crashing back down to earth as I remembered what had happened last night. How he’d got the news about his Dad passing. How we’d come to bed and he’d held me so tightly I thought he’d never let me go.
I sat bolt upright.
Where was Mat?
