Page 40 of A Wish For Jo
He skimmed through the online folder of saved recipes he'd created by searching for key ingredients. Tinned tomatoes, feta cheese, red onions, butternut squash. By some miracle, Janette had a butternut squash — 'odd-shaped bugger, dinnae ken what it's for' — and quinoa, which she described as 'like fish food '. No fresh spinach, but Harvey reckoned frozen would do just as well.
Assembling the ingredients for the dish, he heard his phone ping. Praying it wasn't Jo cancelling on him, he hurried through to the lounge. He looked at the cracked screen and icy shards of horror stabbed at his gut.
Hi, Harley. Been a long time. Just wondered how you were and if we could meet up soon. I have something I want to talk to you about. Abby x
A torrent of thoughts flooded Harvey's brain. Hadn't he blocked her? He couldn't remember now. What with fielding calls from journalists and dealing with the crippling grief of losing Lindsey, he hadn't known his arse from his elbow. What could she possibly want to talk about? Unless … unless she felt guilty about the whole fiasco and wanted to set the record straight.
Harvey slammed the phone down on the table. He didn't want to talk to her. Instinct told him that whatever Abby had to say would not draw a line under the whole sorry saga. More like exhume it and parade it around for her own personal gain.
Sod it, he needed a drink. He'd conjured up his nemesis by allowing her into his head. Harvey returned to the kitchen, chopped a red onion with serial-killer fervour, and poured himself a generous measure of whisky. Alcohol wasn't the answer, but right now it seared his insides with caustic precision.
Put that knife down before you add a couple of fingers to tonight's meal. Lindsey? No, just the voice he conjured up when life threw another pile of shit in his direction. He'd never forget her: she'd always occupy a special place in his heart. A heart the size of a large fist, but with an infinite capacity to expand and welcome newcomers. Like Jo. She'd already snuck in there and made herself at home. He hoped he'd earned a little space in her heart, too.
As he sautéed and soaked, Harvey wondered again whether he should have fought harder against Abby's false allegations. Arthur, his elusive agent, had advised him to lie low, not pursue legal action which could hamper his career. The last thing Harvey had wanted was to drag the whole sorry business through the courts. He'd adopted the ostrich approach, but his career had tanked anyway.
Bringing the quinoa to a boil, Harvey pondered the Aaliyah enigma. Something didn't add up, but he couldn't put his finger on it. Maybe she was Jo's estranged daughter, returned to the fold after years apart. Yet whatever secrets Jo might keep, a long-lost daughter didn't seem likely.
Focusing on the task ahead, Harvey scrutinised the squash. It was indeed a peculiar shape, with a skin that would have challenged the scalpel-wielding skills of Buffalo Bill inThe Silence Of The Lambs. Harvey picked out a paring knife and began hacking away. A minute later, he conceded defeat and chopped the beast into chunks. Wasn't the skin good for you, anyway?
Another message arrived. Bloody Abby again.I hope you're not ignoring me. You know I don't like that. It's in your interest to hear what I have to say.No signing off or kiss this time: just an underlying essence of bunny boiler.
Harvey doused the squash chunks in olive oil, seasoned them liberally, and bunged them in the oven with the onions. He considered roasting his phone at the same time, watching it char and crisp until Abby's messages turned to ash.
Only an hour now till Jo arrived. Time to freshen up, make Brae Cottage look halfway decent and hope that the evening provided a distraction in the nicest possible way.
Lathering up in the shower, Harvey tried a little 'count your blessings' exercise. Lindsey had insisted on it, even when the cancer declared itself the outright winner in the duked-out battle.
'I met you.'
'And you are a very lucky woman to have done so.'
'Modest as ever. I had a lovely childhood, great parents, and only one person ever mocked me at school for having sticky-out ears.'
'And you decked them with an impressive right hook, if I recall correctly.'
'I did, and you always encouraged me to wear my hair up and show off those jug handles with pride.'
'Because your beauty eclipses your ears. I love you for all your faults—Ouch, that hurt!'
'And I love you because there is absolutely no reason not to love you. My darling, leaving you will be the hardest thing I've ever done. Apart from sitting maths exams. Why did I waste so much time on this earth stressing about algebra and trigonometry when I could have been living?'
At that point — so near the end of Lindsey’s life — Harvey had lost it. Sobbed till his body trembled and convulsed. Now… He held out a hand and pressed his thumb to his palm.
I met you.
Next finger.You believed in me when my belief tank was running on empty.
And another.I always thought sex was just sex. Making love was for sappy books and slushy movies. You taught me that love is made when two people click like pieces of a puzzle. No gaps, no awkward edges, just a perfect fit.
One more finger and a pinkie. Harvey crushed them into his palm, scouring the flesh with his nails.I'm moving on, Lindsey. That doesn't feel much like a blessing. I'd give everything I have to bring you back. But I promise that my love for you will never wane.
Harvey stepped out of the shower, his face damp from both the water and the tears that he couldn't contain. Yet he felt at peace with himself. Damn Abby and her stupid attempts to stir things up. Tonight he'd revel in Jo's company and thank his lucky stars for having a second chance at happiness.
CHAPTER40
'Of courseyou don't have three more wishes!' Aaliyah pulled a face and giggled.
Dhassim retrieved his WIFI from the pocket of his jogging bottoms and thrust it at Jo. 'Look. Nada, zilch, zero. This baby is in sleep mode.'
