Page 87 of Slayin Villain
“You shouldn’t be here.”
“I know.”
A beat of silence stretched between us, the wind pushing through the oak trees around my mom’s house like it was holding its breath too.
“I ain’t here to fight,” he said finally.“Ain’t here to pull you back.I just...needed to see you.”
I stepped outside and pulled the door mostly shut behind me, keeping the screen between us and the warmth of the house.
He glanced down at the small curve of my belly and swallowed.
“Is it...okay?”
“Healthy,” I said.“For now.”
His shoulders sagged with visible relief.“Good.”
Another long pause.Neither of us quite looking the other in the eye.
Then I said it, blunt and cold, because he hadn’t earned my softness anymore.
“You only cared when you thought Ember might be pregnant.”
That got him.
He flinched like I’d struck him.
“I didn’t know what I felt,” he admitted.“I was scared.Angry.Gutted.I thought I ruined everything with you, and when I found out Ember was, hell, I clung to it.Like it might give me purpose again.”
“And what about me, Villain?You had me.You had a woman who trusted you.Who chose you?Who didn’t flinch?”
“I know.”His voice cracked.“And I fucked it all up.Rachel, I was gonna patch you.I had the damn thing in my hand.But then everything with Ember…”
“You chose her.”My eyes stung.“Don’t stand here now pretending you didn’t.”
“I chose to run from you,” he growled, suddenly sounding angry, at himself more than me.“I chose wrong.And I’ve paid for it every goddamn day since.”
I wrapped my arms around myself, hating that I still shook in his presence, hating that part of me wanted to reach out and pull him into me.My voice wavered.
“I gave you everything.”
“I know.”
“I loved you.”
“I still love you.”
That stopped me cold.
I blinked, stunned.
“I’ve never stopped,” he said, stepping forward, not close enough to touch me but close enough to burn.“You’re the one I think about when I wake up.The one I dream about when I get drunk.The one I see when I picture that kid’s first steps, first words, first ride on a mini bike.You, Rachel.Not her.”
Tears broke loose.
I turned my face away.
He didn’t move.Just let me cry, let me have the silence.
