Page 56 of A Summer of New Beginnings
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After breakfast Zara made her way into town and purchased some comfy clothes to travel home in. Noah was going to have a field day when he got her expenses bill. She changed in the fitting room with the permission of the shop staff and immediately felt better. Linen trousers and a T-shirt were better for travelling in than cycling leggings and a base layer. She also purchased some slip-on trainershoes that she could easily take off on the train seeing as she was booked into first class and had more room to herself.
The railway station was buzzing with business people and holiday-makers alike as she boarded the train for Euston. She had already messaged her family and best friends over breakfast to let them know she would be home around seven that evening and expected the same group wouldbe there to welcome her.
Home.That special four-letter word. She should be feeling excited and relieved about the journey, so why did she feel so deflated and sad instead? She took her seat in first class and pulled out the novel she had purchased in the station, knowing full well that she probably wouldn’t be able to concentrate. It was going to be a very long day and she figured she mightas well try to sleep at some point. Although, knowing how tired she was from all the fresh air, she doubted it would take much effort to drift off.
Various people embarked and disembarked the train during the journey and the scenery changed before her very eyes. Gone were the mountains and lochs and instead were industrial towns, factories and houses. Zara kept on checking her phone. No messages.Well, except for the silly ones she kept receiving from Shelley and Marco. Shelley was dress shopping for the reunion and Marco was joining in. In one of the messages he had offered to be her date for the school event as Shelley was taking Jake. She’d accepted on the proviso that he didn’t wear a dress and upstage her – his legs were far better. And at least if it was awful she and Marco couldjust escape and go home.
The event was in three days and she hadn’t a clue what she would wearorif she even wanted to go. The previous eleven days had been tough but enlightening in ways she’d simply never expected and the desire to brag about her wonderful life seemed less important. She was definitely changed now. She felt stronger; more empowered. She didn’t need anyone’s approval any more.Not after what she had achieved. But perhaps she’d feel differently when she arrived home back to her real life? She certainly hoped this bizarre heaviness inside her would lift.
Just before seven in the evening her final train pulled into Euston and she gathered her belongings. As she was walking towards the exit her phone pinged. Eagerly she took it out but once again her hopes were dashed.
It was Josh.
Hi Zara. I hope you slept well in your fancy hotel room. There was nothing I wanted more than to climb into that bed with you and show you how much you mean to me and how sorry I am for what I put you through. But I’m trying hard to give you the space I know you need. I hope you’re still thinking about us and remembering the good times. And I hope I can see you when you arrive home.Even if it’s just for a drink and a chat. Remember I love you. J xx
She closed her eyes and remembered how emotional he had been when he had apologised. He wasn’t the type of man to show such strong feelings, so he must have been sincere. She had a lot more thinking to do, but she knew she missed him like crazy even though he’d trampled on her heart and her trust.
Pretty soon all thoughts ofJosh and Lachlan were shoved to the back of her mind as she was enveloped in a familiar group hug. Her parents, brothers and best friends were there just as she’d expected. For some reason being surrounded by so much love brought her emotions bubbling to the surface and she sobbed into whoever was closest.
‘Aww, bless her. Poor darlin’s all tired out, aren’t you, petal?’ her mum said as she kissedthe side of her head.
Zara nodded. ‘Yeah, I think that’s it,’ she lied. She knew very well what the problem was. And it wasn’t to do with tiredness. Not really.
Marco grabbed her tight. ‘I’ve missed you and your inability to make decent coffee. Oh, and I have a nice bottle of Pinot Noir breathing at home for us. Shells and Jake are coming too, aren’t you, Shells?’
Shelley was next to grappleher into a bear hug. ‘Don’t listen to him. Your coffee’s not that bad. And, yes, Jake will be there when we get to yours.’ She pulled away and peered into Zara’s eyes. ‘That’s if you’re up for company? I know you’ve been stressed on that awful trip.’
Zara sniffed and smiled. ‘It really hasn’t been awful. And I’m happy to have company, it’s fine. Although I may need to crash early. I’m bushed.’
She glanced up and spotted her dad waiting patiently to hug her. She walked over to him and he pulled her close. ‘How you doing, Princess? Do I need to duff anyone up?’
She frowned. ‘I’m fine, Dad. Why would you think you need to hit someone?’
He tilted her chin up. ‘You’re crying. But it’s not tiredness. I know you. Somethingor someonehas hurt you.’
She shook her head and buried her facein his shoulder. ‘No, it’s nothing like that, Dad. I think I really am just tired and glad to be home.’
He kissed the top of her head. ‘Well, you let me know if someone needs sortin’, okay?’
She adored her dad and the way he wanted to protect her. But he was the least violent person she knew, in spite of his assertions to the contrary. Once she had kissed her parents and brothers and said hergoodbyes with a promise to come for Sunday lunch, she climbed into Shelley’s car.
‘Come on. Spill it, Zee. Something’s up. You’re different.’ Shelley had always been perceptive so there was no point in making things up.
Zara shrugged. ‘I think the trip just affected me more than I expected.’
Marco twisted in his seat. ‘In what way? Was it that bad? What about the farmer you stayed with? Washe an ugly munter?’ He bombarded her with questions as if he was interrogating her.
Shelley huffed. ‘Bloody hell, Marco, let the girl answer… But anyway, Zee, whathesaid.’
Zara couldn’t help giggling at the familiar banter between her two friends. ‘He was acrofter.’ She smiled as she remembered Lachy correcting her. ‘And it wasn’tbadat all. In fact… it was quite… awesome.’
A stunned silencefell in the car. Her friends were clearly gobsmacked – which was a first. ‘So you enjoyed getting a sore arse and being eaten alive by midges?’
She laughed again. ‘I didn’t actually get bitten much. Josh had recommended some really good repellent so—’
‘Oh, God, speaking of Josh. I was shocked when he came round looking for you. I told him you were going to be delayed because you’d been in anaccident, which seemed to spur him on more. I still can’t believe he booked that posh hotel and came up there though. He seems to want you back really badly, Zee.’ Marco cringed as he told her.
