Page 10 of Cruel When He Smiles
Nate
Itrytoputthe other night out of my head.
I don’t want to think about the way Liam looked at me, how he stepped into my space, or how he spoke in that low voice that was trying to pull something out of me I don’t fucking have. I don’t want to think about the way my breath stuttered, or how, for a split second, I wasn’t sure what the fuck he was getting at.
I hate that I reacted at all.
So, I start my day as usual. I get up early, down a protein shake, and go for a run to clear my head. It helps. The burn in my legs, the steady rhythm of my feet hitting pavement, the crisp morning air cutting through the leftover fog in my brain.
It all reminds me that I’m real, grounded, and not whatever the fuck Liam thinks he sees when he looks at me. By the time I hit the showers and change for class, I almost feel normal again.
The field of Sports Medicine isn’t something people get excited about, but I enjoy it. It makes sense. It’s logical. It’s aboutunderstanding the body, knowing how to fix it when it breaks, and knowing how far you can push before it gives.
I appreciate a clear cause and effect, that injuries follow patterns, that you can take something damaged and put it back together. It’s the opposite of everything else in my life—it makes sense.
So here I am, ready to give twelve or so years of my life away because I found something worth living for aside from soccer. Something just forme.
My first two classes fly by, and I let myself sink into the routine of it. Taking notes, tuning out the bullshit, keeping my head down. No one is looking at me sideways, no one is whispering about what happened at the party, no one is bringing up Liam. I can pretend none of it happened.
Then lunch rolls around, and Sage finds me.
“Tell me why you look less miserable than usual,” he says, dropping his tray onto the table across from me.
I smirk. “Because I’m having a good day.”
Sage raises an eyebrow. “Seriously, though,” he says, leaning back in his chair. “You good?”
I exhale, rolling my shoulders. “Yeah. Just need to get through today.”
He hums. “Right. And by get through today, you mean surviving another mandatory therapy session with your bestie?”
I flip him off. “Eat your food.”
He snickers but lets it go.
The rest of lunch is easy. Sage keeps the conversation moving, and for a while, I almost forget about what’s coming next.
I can pretend I don’t have to sit in a room with Liam Callahan. I can pretend he’s just some normal guy I happened to punch during practice. But then the clock keeps ticking, and before I know it, I’m standing outside Dr. Ellis’s office, forcing myself to go in.
Liam is already there, casually leaning back in his chair. He looks up when I walk in, and his hazel eyes gleam. It’s as if he knows I spent the entire day trying to forget about him.
I ignore it and drop into the chair, slouching slightly, making it clear I don’t want to be here. Dr. Ellis glances between us before offering her usual tight smile. “Good to see you both.”
I don’t respond. Liam does.
“It’s always a pleasure, Dr. Ellis,” he says smoothly.
She nods approvingly, then turns to me. “Nate, how has your week been?”
I shrug. “Fine.”
She waits, clearly thinking I’m going to elaborate, but I don’t. Liam does it for me.
“Nate’s had a busy week,” he says, his voice light, conversational. “You should’ve seen him at the frat party last week. Really let loose.”
I turn my head slowly, meeting his gaze. His expression is relaxed and friendly, but his eyes are filled with glee. I know what he’s doing.
I force a smirk. “Yeah, you seemed really interested in watching me.”
