Page 47 of Blazing Desires
I notice the ribbon is still tied in her hair. I work it loose gently and place it on the nightstand, grabbing my phone to turn off the lights and placing it next to her ribbon. I carefully untwist her curls from the unruly mess the helmet created. We lay like this for a while as I listen to her breathing, soaking in the fact that she’s here with me.
“Sleep, my love. You're safe with me, I promise.”
I brush her curls away from her face with one hand and hold her close to me with the other, until her breaths turn even and slow and I know she’s asleep.
“I still love you, Mea Divina.”
Chapter 21
A Good Girl
Davina
My eyes flutter open. I have no idea what time it is.
The room is dark and unfamiliar and I'm sleeping on something hard, heaviness wrapping around me and keeping me pinned. I try to move but it doesn't budge. Dread seeps through my body at the feeling of being trapped somewhere unfamiliar, making me pull harder at the restraints. I manage to get free and scramble backwards to get my back to a wall. My chest heaves as I try and drag air into my lungs.
They must’ve come for me.
Now that I’ve woken enough to grasp that I'm on a bed, I hear a deep and rough curse in the darkness.“Fuck.”
As I’m about to get my feet onto solid ground, soft light blooms into the room, momentarily blinding my sleep-filled eyes. I raise a hand to block some of it out until they can adjust, although the light doesn’t tell me whether it’s morning or still the middle of the night. Calloused hands hold onto mine as Blaze's concerned face appears through the haze. My heart is pounding a brutal rhythm in my chest, adrenaline coursing through my veins like liquid fire.
“It’s just me. You're okay, love. You're safe. I've got you.”
He takes my hand and places it on his chest, the thudding of his heart tingling under my palm and moving with each steady breath he takes.
“Just breathe with me, you're okay.”
My panic eases with each heartbeat and breath as I focus my eyes on his, the deep forest green grounding me as reality seeps back in and the events of the last day filter back into my mind. Dread fills me, but I push the thought away until I can almost ignore it.
“Blaze, I?—"
He lifts me toward him as if I weigh nothing, holding me close to his chest and rubbing soothing circles on my back just like he had before. I tuck my face into his neck and take deep inhales until I’ve calmed down.
His scent, which is so inherentlyhim, fills my lungs with a heady mix of sandalwood, amber, and the faint scent of coffee. It is like coating myself in the warmest, softest blanket I can find. We stay like that for a while. It's so nice to be held, it's been a long time since someone embraced me like this. But I can't get used to it, every time I let myself enjoy it, it's ripped away from me. The miserable reminder settles into my bones, making them grow heavy. I’m torturing myself for allowing Blaze to touch me like this.
The way he kissed me to free me from my panic attack plays in my head on repeat. His mouth was so soft and yet so dominating. I couldn't do anything except let him in to do whatever he wanted to me.
He consumed me and now he's ruined me because I know, Iknowthat nobody out there will be able to compare to him or live up to that kiss. With the way our bodies had aligned so perfectly, all thoughts and good sense had left me until I was consumed by him. My panic attack had been forgotten.
I had been ready to lay myself bare and beg him to take me and show me just how much he could wreck me.I could easily plant a kiss on his neck right now, and the urge to do so is ratcheting up in intensity, but fear is holding me back.
What if he only kissed me because he had no choice? What if he's changed his mind? What if I imagined everything between us, what if he's only pretending, WHAT IF, WHAT IF, WHAT I-
OH, SHUT UP!!!
I scream at myself internally, the shouts bouncing off the corners of my mind. I am so fucking sick and tired of my fear controlling me, robbing me of simply living in the moment. My mind settles and serenity washes over me, silencing my demons. I finally do something I want to for once.
I kiss his neck, the skin warm on my lips and I hold my breath as I wait for his reaction. I don’t have to wait long. His arms tighten around me, his gravelly voice vibrating through his chest as his nickname for me falls from his lips.
“Mea Divina.”
It's a warning, a plea, apromise. My body lights up with anticipation and relief. Emboldened, I do it again, brushing my lips over the column of his throat and stopping where his carved jaw meets his neck. He continues to pull me closer to him instead of pushing me away.
Feeling brave, I place open-mouthed kisses along the same trail I'd followed, the taste of him bursting on my tongue as I let a moan slip free. He lets out another of his own, but it sounds more like a growl.
One of his hands leaves my back and plunges into my hair, gently tugging on the strands. I worry he's going to make me stop and the doubt creeps back in, but he doesn’t move me away.
